AS divorce is on the increase in numerous places in the world, blended families have become a common type of household. Many families have a lot of difficulties navigating this unique family situa­tion with success.

A major reason is that members of blended families need to make many adjustments in their lives. The transition can be problematic. And trying to force it can breed conflict and resentment.

Last week we looked at four tips that would help ease the transition, this week we continue with final six tips.

13. Expect them to think it is temporary.

Accept the fact that your children may expect you and their other parent to reconcile. They may fantasise that your new relationship with your partner is only tempo­rary. This is, especially true in the beginning. Find a time to sit down with the children and explain that when two people are unable to live together anymore, it doesn’t mean they love their children any less.

14. Expect resentment.

No matter how good a parent you are, you will never be the bio­logical parent of your stepchildren. It is natural for a stepchild to feel some resentment for you, especially when you are setting limits for their behaviour.

15. Show the children love.

Sometimes children need love the most at a time when it is the most difficult to give it to them. While bad behavior should never be rewarded, always praise children when they are behaving well.

16. As a stepparent, be sure to take the time to bond with your new children.

Your stepchild may be resistant, but it’s important for you to lead the way and demonstrate that you are interested and care.

17. Children thrive with sched­ules and consistency.

The transition will be much smoother if everyone knows what’s expected of them. Have a conver­sation early on that outlines the expectations and ground rules.

18. Communication is vital.

Ask how you can make the children more comfortable and let them know what you need, too. Honour requests and communicate boundaries as appropriate. Most children just want to know that you’ll still be there for them. Reas­sure them.

Source – eddinscounseling.com

Marriage can be seen as an emotional union because it involves two people committing to each other in a deep and mean­ingful way. The emotional connection between spouses is a fundamental aspect of any healthy marriage. Emo­tional intimacy, trust, and support are all essential components of a happy and lasting marriage.

When two people decide to get married, they are making a commit­ment to share their lives with each other, which includes sharing their emotional states. This emotional con­nection can be established through: 1. communication, 2. trust, 3. conflict resolution, 4. shared experiences, and 5. empathic understanding.

1. Communication:

As earlier stated, one of the most important aspects of emotional con­nection in marriage is communication. Effective communication involves not only expressing one’s thoughts and feelings but also listening actively and empathetically to one’s spouse. Good communication is a key ingredient in building trust and intimacy in a mar­riage.

2. Trust:

Trust is also a vital element of emotional connection in marriage. Trust involves being reliable and consistent in one’s behaviour, as well as being transparent and honest with one’s spouse. When spouses trust each other, they feel more secure and comfortable being vulnerable with each other, which can deepen their emotional bond.

3. Conflict resolution:

Another important aspect of emo­tional connection in marriage is the ability to manage conflict effectively. Conflict is inevitable in any relation­ship, but how spouses handle conflict can either strengthen or weaken their emotional bond. Healthy conflict management involves active listening, expressing oneself respectfully, and working together to find a solution that meets both spouses’ needs.

4. Shared experiences:

In addition to communication, trust, and conflict management, emotional connection in marriage is also built through shared experiences and creating a sense of shared mean­ing. This can involve things like shared hobbies or interests, participating in community service together, or cre­ating traditions and rituals that hold special meaning for the couple.

5. Empathic understanding:

One important component of emo­tional connection in marriage is the ability to show empathy and under­standing towards one’s spouse. This involves recognising and validating one’s spouse’s feelings, even if you do not necessarily agree with them. When partners feel heard and understood, they are more likely to feel emotional­ly connected and supported.

However, it is important to note that not all marriages are emotionally fulfilling. Sometimes, couples may find they have grown apart emotionally, or they are unable to meet each other’s emotional needs. In these cases, it may be necessary to seek professional counselling. You can contact Counselor Prince & Associates Consult (CPAC) for professional help. Seek professional counselling when you find you have grown apart emotionally, or you’re unable to meet each other’s emotional needs in the marriage.

Marriage is a complex and multifac­eted union, and emotional connection is just one aspect of it. Beyond emo­tional intimacy, marriage also involves spiritual, physical, financial, and social connections between spouses. In a healthy marriage, spouses support and encourage each other’s growth, and work together to navigate life’s challenges.

Marriage can be a deeply emotion­al, happy, fulfilling and lasting union when both spouses are committed to nurturing their emotional connection and building a strong foundation for their relationship. Spouses in a healthy marriage strive to understand and sup­port each other, even during difficult times. Emotional connection in mar­riage does not necessarily mean spous­es have to share every single emotion and thought with each other. It is okay to have some level of individuality and privacy in a marriage.

It is important to note that emo­tional connection in marriage does not necessarily mean spouses have to share every single emotion and thought with each other. It is okay to have some level of individuality and privacy in a marriage. However, as spouses, you should strive to maintain an emotional connection by regularly checking in with each other and mak­ing time for each other.

Finally, it is vital to recognise that emotional connection in marriage is not a one-time event, but an ongoing process. It requires effort, commit­ment, and a willingness to be vulner­able with each other. By prioritising emotional connection in your mar­riage, you and your spouse can build a strong foundation for a happy, lasting and fulfilling marital relationship.

To be continued …

Source: Excerpts from ‘Preparing for a Happy and Fulfilling Marriage’ Book by REV. COUNSELOR PRINCE OFFEI (Psychotherapist and Marriage Therapist). https://counselorprin­ceass.wixsite.com/edu-counsel­ing-psych

https://princeoffei22.wixsite. com/website-psychologist

https://princeoffei22.wixsite. com/website

COUNSELOR PRINCE & ASSOCIATES CONSULT (CPAC COUNSELLOR TRAIN­ING INSTITUTE)