Obaa Yaa
Can l forgive hubby for leaving us 22 years?
I got married 26 years ago to a gentleman who was initially very loving and caring by all standards. We were both happy in our marriage and blessed with two pretty girls.
As things were not going on well, my husband left Ghana 22 years ago to seek better economic fortunes in the United States of America (USA). At the time my husband was leaving, our children were four and two years old respectively.
He has not paid any visit to Ghana, let alone made any effort to enable us to join him there since leaving the shores of this country.
Initially, he wrote letters frequently to find out how we fared and enquired about the educational progress of the children.
More than 18 years now, we have not heard from him and are worried if he is still alive.
l have single- handedly looked after the children without the support of any of his relatives.
Surprisingly, he has written about two months ago to inform me that he has re-married and was no longer interested in me.
ObaaYaa, l must confess that this man has really ruined my life and caused me serious harm because l had turned down offers from many suitors who are now happily married with children.
Can l take legal action against him for damage caused me?
Ampoma, Accra.
Dear Ampoma,
l commend you for the ordeal you have gone through to take care of your children single-handedly in spite of the daunting challenges.
I can envisage how you feel and how enraged you must be against your husband who has not treated you well,as you try to remember the men who had proposed to marry you.
Though he could be charged by the court to pay you an alimony, you should desist from taking a legal action against him for the interest of your children.
Additionally, you should not infer that your marriage to those who had proposed to you would have been sailing well just like those they are married to. This is to confirm the fact that all the hands are not equal.
Obaa Yaa
My boss is tormenting me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I have worked in a private environment in Accra for 10 years now. People talk about how stressful it is to work in a private sector but I did not believe it till I had my fair share of experience working with my new boss.
Recently, our boss was transferred and was replaced by a new boss.
In fact, I am finding it difficult to work with him.
Looking at my age, he talks to me like am a small boy and relates to me like a teacher and his pupil.
Sometimes, I feel like hitting him but it is against the rules of our company.
I currently do not have another employment opportunity. What can I do? I can’t cope with his behaviour anymore.
Joe Boy,
Ashiaman.
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Dear Joe Boy,
I am afraid you’d have to cope with your boss for the meantime. Learn to live with the ‘devil’ until you find a way about it.
Just live up to your responsibility; perform your functions to the best of your knowledge and do not misbehave towards him.
If he sees that you are competent, he would begin to respect you. Remember that respect is earned not demanded.
Obaa Yaa
I am in a state of dilemma
Dear Obaa Yaa,
My name is Owusu and I am 35- years -old while my wife is 30 years. We have been married for five years but been together for seven years. We have two children together and they are doing so well in their academics.
My company had a conference at a hotel in Kumasi and four of us from my department were selected to represent the company.
During lunch, I decided to take a stroll and enjoy the scenery around the hotel since it’s my first time there.
As I strolled around, I was shocked to see my wife step out of a car with a young man. They started walking towards the reception of the hotel. The man placed his arms around her waist and they seemed to be enjoying each other’s company.
I froze and felt bad. I wanted to shout and approach them but when I opened my mouth, no words came out and my feet were too heavy to drag. I just watched them in awe as they checked in at the reception and disappeared from my sight.
I am in my mother’s house now, I do not know how I will face her if I eventually go home. I told her my mom needs help with a few things at the house so I will lend a helping hand and also sleep over. I haven’t told anyone but my mom suspects that something is wrong.
I am down right now, my marriage and home seem to be coming to an end. Please what should I do?
Sakyi, Adenta.
Dear Sakyi,
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I understand how you feel and I plead with you to continue to be patient with your wife.
Please try and go home to have a word with her concerning the incident you saw.
Give her the benefit of doubt to explain what she was exactly doing there at that time with the man.
I am pleading with you to give her a second chance but most importantly, kindly inform her parents about it to talk to her.
You can seek the help of a professional counselor and go for therapies with her.
However, if you are not comfortable staying with her, please part ways with her peacefully. You can co-parent your daughter.
