Obaa Yaa
Can lost wedding ring spark problem in marriage?
Dear ObaaYaa,
A close friend recently lost her wedding ring on a journey and some of us initially did not accord the problem the importance it deserved. However, having considered the tears which dripped from her eyes and the perspiration that had engulfed her made me feel sad about the incident.
This incident set me thinking about what might have caused her to perspire profusely when she discovered that her ring had gotten missing.
Though the bus in which we were travelling had covered some kilometres from where she suspected the wedding ring fell, she insisted to alight and our driver obliged to wait for her.
Thank God she found the ring at the place she suspected it might have fallen and the spontaneous joy that filled us on receipt of the news was quite refreshing.
Can the loss of this ring spark a problem at home since it was a mere accident?
Emelia, Accra.
Dear Emelia,
This column would like to commend you for sharing in the grief of your friend. Every human or married person in the right sense must be worried for the loss of a wedding ring.
Though the incident looks like an ordinary misfortune, it has different connotations which could be interpreted differently.
Additionally, the shedding of copious tears by this woman was to tell the world the sort of husband she had and the reaction which awaited her at home.
On the contrary, a discerning husband who is not jealous and understands issues will consider the problem a misfortune and would not hesitate to sympathise with the wife and quickly arrange to buy a new ring for her but the same cannot be said of other men.
Others will infer that the woman could possibly remove the ring to enable her to have an illicit affair and this will spark a serious quarrel which could lead to divorce.
Obaa Yaa
My boss is tormenting me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I have worked in a private environment in Accra for 10 years now. People talk about how stressful it is to work in a private sector but I did not believe it till I had my fair share of experience working with my new boss.
Recently, our boss was transferred and was replaced by a new boss.
In fact, I am finding it difficult to work with him.
Looking at my age, he talks to me like am a small boy and relates to me like a teacher and his pupil.
Sometimes, I feel like hitting him but it is against the rules of our company.
I currently do not have another employment opportunity. What can I do? I can’t cope with his behaviour anymore.
Joe Boy,
Ashiaman.
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Dear Joe Boy,
I am afraid you’d have to cope with your boss for the meantime. Learn to live with the ‘devil’ until you find a way about it.
Just live up to your responsibility; perform your functions to the best of your knowledge and do not misbehave towards him.
If he sees that you are competent, he would begin to respect you. Remember that respect is earned not demanded.
Obaa Yaa
I am in a state of dilemma
Dear Obaa Yaa,
My name is Owusu and I am 35- years -old while my wife is 30 years. We have been married for five years but been together for seven years. We have two children together and they are doing so well in their academics.
My company had a conference at a hotel in Kumasi and four of us from my department were selected to represent the company.
During lunch, I decided to take a stroll and enjoy the scenery around the hotel since it’s my first time there.
As I strolled around, I was shocked to see my wife step out of a car with a young man. They started walking towards the reception of the hotel. The man placed his arms around her waist and they seemed to be enjoying each other’s company.
I froze and felt bad. I wanted to shout and approach them but when I opened my mouth, no words came out and my feet were too heavy to drag. I just watched them in awe as they checked in at the reception and disappeared from my sight.
I am in my mother’s house now, I do not know how I will face her if I eventually go home. I told her my mom needs help with a few things at the house so I will lend a helping hand and also sleep over. I haven’t told anyone but my mom suspects that something is wrong.
I am down right now, my marriage and home seem to be coming to an end. Please what should I do?
Sakyi, Adenta.
Dear Sakyi,
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I understand how you feel and I plead with you to continue to be patient with your wife.
Please try and go home to have a word with her concerning the incident you saw.
Give her the benefit of doubt to explain what she was exactly doing there at that time with the man.
I am pleading with you to give her a second chance but most importantly, kindly inform her parents about it to talk to her.
You can seek the help of a professional counselor and go for therapies with her.
However, if you are not comfortable staying with her, please part ways with her peacefully. You can co-parent your daughter.