Obaa Yaa
Love is only a small part of it
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a 20-year-old Senior High School graduate living with my parents.
About two weeks ago, I met a young lady who I have fallen so much in love with.
Even though I have qualified to enter a tertiary institution, I want to marry this lady before someone grabs her.
Obaa Yaa, can I go ahead and marry her before continuing my education since education is no race?
David, Ho.
Dear David,
Please take a cue from the saying that ‘first things first’. It is not advisable to stop school just because you want to get married to this lady. Getting married can’t be a priority over education.
You can, however, still be in school and engage her if you are so desperate about clinching her from others.
Whatever it is, remember that your education is more important because that is how you can attain a lucrative career to enable you look after a wife.
Getting married is more than merely falling in love. It inevitably entails putting food on the table, bringing up children, paying school fees, electricity and water bills.
Eventually, you will realise that love is only a small part of the entire enterprise.
Obaa Yaa
My husband is always in the bedroom
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I AM 30 and he is 45. We have been married for three years now. The problem I have with my husband is that when he is not at work and he’s home, and always in the bedroom.
You can never see my husband in the sitting room chatting with the children or with me.
And Obaa Yaa, he only tells the children and I that he loves us when he is tipsy or drunk. That is the only time you will see him in a conversation with us.
Do you believe he really means it when he says he loves us in that mood?
Baaba,
Agona Nyakrom.
*****
Dear Baaba,
Generally, there are many types of personality in everyone and I hope your husband is an introvert. This means he is not the outgoing type and wants to keep to himself either reading or listening to music.
And of course, such a person would need something to stimulate him to be open, expressive and nice, and I guess a little alcohol is doing just that.
If he is not abusing the alcohol, then there is nothing much more to worry about. Be loving and let him be the person God has made him.
Ask the children to go to him anytime he is lonely to share jokes and help them with their homework.
Encourage him to be more communicative and do not nag about him because that will worsen the problem.
Obaa Yaa
Labour ward stories scare me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I JUST missed my period and I know I am pregnant but I am afraid of the repercussions.
It isn’t that there is no money to take care of the pregnancy, but Obaa Yaa, I have heard about all the things that happen at the labour ward.
I want to abort the pregnancy and be fully prepared before getting pregnant again.
I understand it’s a very painful experience and I can’t stand it.
Takyibea,
Eastern Region.
********
Dear Takyibea,
YOU have not written your age in the letter so it will be difficult to advise you on procedures to take.
You have also not told me whether or not you are married.
If you are above 21 and married, do not go and abort.
Many women have aborted pregnancies and ended up as barren. Besides, abortion is criminal and you can be prosecuted for it.
If there is money to look after the pregnancy, go ahead and deliver the baby.
Those stories you hear of labour pains should not scare or frighten you.
God takes every woman through it and there is nothing to postpone about it. Unless you do not want to have a baby, you must forget the labour ward stories and be hopeful.
The baby will bring you joy and open more doors for you because children are blessings from God.
Don’t listen to any negative news about child birth.