Obaa Yaa
Many disappointments worrying
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a graduate teacher plying my trade in one of the prestigious schools in Accra with a good salary. Though l am desirous of getting married, and starting my family on time, three successive relationships have been unsuccessful and the problem keeps worrying me and l am gradually getting frustrated.
The situation has got to a stage that people are pointing accusing fingers at me as the cause of the frequent break ups in my relationships. Some colleagues, who were concerned about the frequent unsuccessful relationships and enquired from me, were satisfied with the explanation l gave them.
Unfortunately, others who could not muster the courage to find out from me held the wrong impression that l was the cause of the problem and, therefore, considered me a bad person.
Having had enough of the ridicule, insults and humiliation among others, l have decided to stay single not to meddle in the affairs of others in order to be embarrassed.
I am worried and incapable of lifting up my head in society. What shall l do?
Frank, Accra.
Dear Frank,
It is my belief that certain things happen without following any particular formula. The unsuccessful relationships you have encounterred could be due to coincidence and should not force you to think otherwise and throw up your hands in total despair.
What you ought to do is to study your lover before you enter into any serious relationship. This will prevent the incidence of frequent embarrassment as you have described in your letter. I wish you success in your next relationship.
Obaa Yaa
Under pressure from family to marry
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am 38 and single. In spite of the pressure I receive from my mother, I have decided not to marry now until I am financially sound.
It is this same mother of mine who would keep asking me for things even when I am married.
Obaa Yaa, recently my mother actually came to my house with a 10 member delegation from my hometown in the Ashanti Region at dawn.
Their mission was to give me two weeks ultimatum to marry or else they would bring me a wife from the village.
Obaa Yaa, please what should I do?
Akwasi.
Dear Akwasi,
MARRIAGE is not a child’s play. I understand the fact that you want to be financially sound to decide on marriage.
You are not getting younger so try to give ear to what your mother is saying.
No one can force you to marry against your will. Get to your mother with a respectable elder and let her know that she is embarrassing you with her unwarranted demands.
Assure her that in your own good time, you would get married and that you are not prepared to accept any imposition.
Obaa Yaa
He forcibly kissed me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a 20-year-old girl and a virgin. I have made up my mind not to have sex before marriage or involve myself in any immoral acts.
Interestingly, when I turned 25, I met a man who was in his early thirties doing so well with business.
He is very kind, lovely, faithful, caring, humble and God-fearing.
We began dating for some time and because he didn’t ask for sex, I concluded he was the right man for me.
One holiday, we decided to hang out. He proposed marriage to me, when I said yes, he forcibly kissed me.
Looking at things, I am afraid that he will one day forcibly have sex with me.
Should I go on with this relationship?
Annora, Sunyani.
Dear Anora,
YOU are growing and you should be able stand by the decisions you take.
Once this man has forcibly kissed you, what he intends to do next is to have sex with you.
He might be a good man so don’t end the relationship because of the incident that happened.
If you are not ready to marry, do not accept any love proposal from a man.
If you are also interested in him, kindly tell him to do the needful before any other thing.
