Obaa Yaa
My boyfriend is unhappy with our open relationship
Dear Obaa Yaa,
My boyfriend happily agreed to an open relationship but now that I am getting a lot more attention than him, he wants to return to monogamy.
I am a 23-year-old woman and he is 24. We met at the university and have been together for four years.
I have always felt like I met him too early. While I love and respect him and want to spend the rest of my life with him, there is so much more I want to experience first.
I want to travel and meet different people. To be honest, I want to have more sexual experiences before I settle down.
I have told my boyfriend I was interested in an open relationship and he had never rejected the idea out rightly, but when I got a job and was posted to a different region, I felt strongly the time was right to put my plan into action.
Although we both love each other and want to stay together this arrangement seemed to me the best way to be romantically involved and sexually satisfied while living in different places.
Six months into my posting, I have had four partners while my boyfriend has had none.
Now he says we should end the relationship. Please what should I do?
Esther, Pokuase
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Dear Esther,
I must say that it was a bad arrangement in the first place for both of you to have accepted to engage in such ungodly act. For a relationship to thrive, there should be trust and respect but if none is present then the relationship will go nowhere.
If you are ready for a monogamous relationship, then you must stop this behaviour.
You have been unfaithful to your boyfriend for having other partners. Remember you are prone to contracting a sexually transmitted disease easily if you engage in sexual activities with multiple sexual partners.
Forget about exploring the world and settle down with your boyfriend.
Obaa Yaa
Can malt make me tall?
Dear Obaa Yaa, Can malt make me tall?
I am a boy of 16 years and I have a group of friends who are taller than me. They always mock me. They say that I am too short to be in their company.
They even tell me that I spoil their chances of meeting girls because the girls do not look at them when I am in their company.
Is there any medicine which makes people tall or any exercise which can make me tall?
Is it really true that malt can make people tall? My friends say that weightlifting can also help.
Oware
Accra.
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Dear Oware,
People who make you unhappy do not qualify to be called friends, and your first worry should be how to leave their company.
You are only 16 years, and there is still a great chance that you might add a few inches to your height.
But if it doesn’t happen, don’t let it be a problem because it not how tall or short a person is which matters, but what a person achieves.
There are no known drugs or drinks (Malt included) which can increase a person’s height.
Exercises and weightlifting will not make you tall, but they can at least make you fit and healthy.
Obaa Yaa
I want a divorce
Dear Obaa Yaa,
After two years of marriage, I have realised that I made a big mistake in marrying my wife. She has become very different from the woman I knew and married; she is so uncompromising.
I have met another girl who is just the type of girl I should have married. She agrees with me on everything and does not harass me the way my wife does.
My wife will not agree to a divorce and my girl refuses to be a second wife. I am caught in a dilemma, because both my wife and my girlfriend are making my life hell. I feel very tempted to leave them both.
Owusu,
Tafo.
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Dear Owusu
Maybe you should give your marriage another chance. For all you know, your wife is just as unhappy as you are but she is trying to live with the situation.
Your girlfriend’s attitude now is different from your wife’s and that should tell you that no one is perfect. It should also prove to you that when people are not happy, they behave differently.
Try and communicate with your wife more and discuss your problems no matter how little it might look.
If you make the effort to keep your marriage, you might be surprised at the positive changes that will take place in your life.
