Obaa Yaa
My husband disowns pregnancy
We have been married for seven years and blessed with three children. Two years ago, my husband relocated to Kumasi on postings and he occasionally comes back to the family to spend weekends.
When l informed him that l was pregnant, he asked me of the last time l had my period. After this information, he did not show any sign of annoyance and everything went on smoothly until he left for Kumasi.
Four months into my pregnancy, my husband has become angry under the pretext that since he was in Kumasi per his calculations and not physically present with me, he could not have been responsible for the pregnancy.
He said my pregnancy has confirmed reports he had received from some sources of my association with a certain man in our locality.
He asked that l should pack my belongings from the house for good and leave the children with him.
Despite my explanation that l cannot indulge in extra-marital affairs, he does not want to believe what l tell him.
Can l inform my parents about the current development and the next step to take in order to salvage my reputation?
Ama, Tema.
Dear Ama,
It is unfortunate things have changed in your marriage and a serious allegation is being levelled against you at the time you are pregnant.
From the tone of your letter, your husband has kept the information he had received about you without verifying the truth from you, the wife.
This is a case of mistrust which has emerged and could have been resolved easily by employing the tools of patience, tolerance and being frank in your deliberations.
You have every right to inform your parents who can take this matter up with your husband at their level.
The surest option is to go for a DNA test at the hospital to ascertain the paternity of the child after you have been delivered of the child.
Obaa Yaa
Text message exposes my boyfriend
Dear Obaa Yaa,
My boyfriend told me he was attending the funeral of her late cousin outside Accra and promised to be back the next day.
Initially, the plan was that I would go with him and spend some time with his family since I have a good relationship with them.
I realised he was not comfortable about that and kept telling me that it’s a distant cousin and there was no to need join him.
He said he was going to park his car at the office and join a family bus.
My boyfriend picked a woman from Accra whom he had arranged with during the week.
I called her sister and she told me that his brother came with a lady and also secured themselves a hotel room.
Immediately he arrived, he went straight to the bath house, a lady sent a text message on his phone appreciating the good time they had together.
I read the message when he was having his bath.
Though her sister gave me every information but the text message confirmed everything.
How can he do such a thing? Why did he take another lady to the funeral and left me behind?
Abrefi, Tesano.
*****
Dear Abrefi,
I Understand how you are feeling at the moment because your boyfriend lied to you.
I advise you to confront your boyfriend on the allegations and let him know you have a proof.
He might be pissed off but that is exactly what you should do.
This will give you the opportunity to insist that you will attend all functions with him so that he will not have the opportunity to misbehave.
In confronting him, be calm. Don’t quarrel or nag.
Obaa Yaa
My boss is tormenting me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I have worked in a private environment in Accra for 10 years now. People talk about how stressful it is to work in a private sector but I did not believe it till I had my fair share of experience working with my new boss.
Recently, our boss was transferred and was replaced by a new boss.
In fact, I am finding it difficult to work with him.
Looking at my age, he talks to me like am a small boy and relates to me like a teacher and his pupil.
Sometimes, I feel like hitting him but it is against the rules of our company.
I currently do not have another employment opportunity. What can I do? I can’t cope with his behaviour anymore.
Joe Boy,
Ashiaman.
******
Dear Joe Boy,
I am afraid you’d have to cope with your boss for the meantime. Learn to live with the ‘devil’ until you find a way about it.
Just live up to your responsibility; perform your functions to the best of your knowledge and do not misbehave towards him.
If he sees that you are competent, he would begin to respect you. Remember that respect is earned not demanded.
