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Obaa Yaa

My wife is lazy in bed

Dear Obaa Yaa,

I am a 40 -year old married and a business man living at Kasoa. My wife, who is 32-years-old, is very supportive and kindhearted.

The only problem is that she is lazy in bed and that is making me lose interest in her.

My wife complains about any position during sex and keeps telling me that my sex drive is too high.

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We have been counselled several times by our pastor and families but still no improvement.

I am worried that I might cheat on her. Please what should I do?

Addo, Kasoa.

Dear Addo,

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Sex forms an important part of marriage life and should not be played with. In marriage, if this aspect is not handled well, it results in serious problems.

It is important to note that husbands and wives have individual differences and tastes which they must identify and be tolerant in helping each other to over­come those differences.

Since it is not easy to get a perfect match in marriage, you must work out modali­ties to meet each other half-way in your sex life so that each person will be satisfied.

It is better to accommo­date the shortcomings of your wife than to cheat on her, which will eventually cause the collapse of your family.

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Obaa Yaa

 My boss is tormenting me

 Dear Obaa Yaa,

I have worked in a private environ­ment in Accra for 10 years now. People talk about how stressful it is to work in a private sector but I did not believe it till I had my fair share of experience working with my new boss.

Recently, our boss was transferred and was replaced by a new boss.

In fact, I am finding it difficult to work with him.

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Looking at my age, he talks to me like am a small boy and relates to me like a teacher and his pupil.

Sometimes, I feel like hitting him but it is against the rules of our com­pany.

I currently do not have another employment opportunity. What can I do? I can’t cope with his behaviour anymore.

Joe Boy,

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Ashiaman.

******

Dear Joe Boy,

I am afraid you’d have to cope with your boss for the meantime. Learn to live with the ‘devil’ until you find a way about it.

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Just live up to your responsibility; perform your functions to the best of your knowledge and do not misbehave towards him.

If he sees that you are compe­tent, he would begin to respect you. Remember that respect is earned not demanded.  

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Obaa Yaa

I am in a state of dilemma

 Dear Obaa Yaa,

My name is Owusu and I am 35- years -old while my wife is 30 years. We have been married for five years but been together for seven years. We have two children together and they are doing so well in their academics.

My company had a conference at a hotel in Kumasi and four of us from my department were selected to represent the company.

During lunch, I decided to take a stroll and enjoy the scenery around the hotel since it’s my first time there.

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As I strolled around, I was shocked to see my wife step out of a car with a young man. They started walking towards the reception of the hotel. The man placed his arms around her waist and they seemed to be enjoy­ing each other’s company.

I froze and felt bad. I wanted to shout and approach them but when I opened my mouth, no words came out and my feet were too heavy to drag. I just watched them in awe as they checked in at the reception and disappeared from my sight.

I am in my mother’s house now, I do not know how I will face her if I eventually go home. I told her my mom needs help with a few things at the house so I will lend a helping hand and also sleep over. I haven’t told anyone but my mom suspects that something is wrong.

I am down right now, my mar­riage and home seem to be coming to an end. Please what should I do?

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Sakyi, Adenta.

Dear Sakyi,

**********

I understand how you feel and I plead with you to continue to be patient with your wife.

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Please try and go home to have a word with her concerning the inci­dent you saw.

Give her the benefit of doubt to explain what she was exactly doing there at that time with the man.

I am pleading with you to give her a second chance but most important­ly, kindly inform her parents about it to talk to her.

You can seek the help of a profes­sional counselor and go for therapies with her.

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However, if you are not comfort­able staying with her, please part ways with her peacefully. You can co-parent your daughter.  

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