Features
Palaver of the past (1)
A national weekly newspaper does not often disappear from the news-stands. So when the Weekly Spectator was not seen on the stands for a couple of weeks, many probably thought the Editor had gone on a honeymoon.
If it had been a private newspaper, one would have guessed that the publisher had gone bankrupt after using the capital together with the profits to chase a beautiful fair-coloured girl.
In any case, the ‘Spectator’ is back on the stands, and as is customary of Sikaman Palava, a review of the past year must always precede current palaver. The past year was very interesting and political. There were some unpleasantries too when people were being roasted for being of a certain political breed.
Early in the year, however, news reaching the territory had it that punk youths were attacking refugee centres and black homes in Germany, meaning that Ghanaian hustlers were probably in some kind of trouble.
Sikaman Palava defined who a hustler is in an article headed HUSTLERS IN THE COLD.
“In Sikaman, if you are not lucky to be born into a well-to-do family, it means you are a hustler by birth. Right from the very onset, it becomes very difficult for your mum to feed you on Lactogen or Cerelac, to make you grow like a normal human being and not like a guinea-pig. So because she cannot afford it, you have to subsist on koko and use the breast-milk as dessert.
“Sooner than anyone would expect, your mother will start pushing banku into your tiny mouth ‘by force… Before you are six months of age, you’ve already started chewing hard plantain like a savage. With that as a major meal you are sure to develop kwashiorkor which means that you’ll have a well- defined pot-belly. So you become a small boy millionaire.”
This is how the hustling begins and one ends up in Germany washing plates to make money while being at the mercy of skin-heads who are armed with guns, knives, clubs and anything that can teach a black- man that Europe is not his ancestral home.
The political game began in earnest when my uncle Kofi Jogolo was about to be chosen as the presidential candidate of a newly-formed party. In fact they elected him because of his charismatic moustache and by the fact that he sneezes like Bill Clinton.
“No doubt that he was chosen to lead a very popular party. With such a piece of moustache, trimmed thrice a week by a Swedish barber who is paid in dollars, there was no way Jogolo could not have headed the party.”
There were many people aspiring to become the next president of the Republic of Ghana. “You’ll see them in many colours and shades. Some are called Sikaman natives, but they are not qualified to be called such because they’ve stayed abroad eating hotdogs, hamburger, pork sandwiches and American suya. And they are around town with smiling faces to contest the presidency.
Soon began the game of political nonsense. “The devil is a politician. It has always been the leader of the opposition against the Kingdom of God. The devil, known in private life as Mr James Lucifer, is the author of the Satanic Manifesto and the inventor of hunger in Somalia.”
PASTIME
The devil also tells lies. “According to Kwame Korkorti the Council Korti, every politician tells an average of 38 lies a day- …Lying in politics has become a hobby, indeed an enjoyable pastime. What about intrigues and treachery? I hear it is going to be a game of embarrassments using facts, figures and lies; and everybody is waiting for the honourable Flight Lieutenant to declare his intentions before the game can really start.”
And the game really did start. In my article head- lined THE PALAVER OF STONE THROWING, I wrote, “When all were in doubt, it was Kokotako who prophesied that the Flight Lieutenant will be the presidential candidate of NDC, and that someone freshman too will aim a large stone at his head and miss the target “He had by not less than 30 metres.
“True to the prophesy, an idiot did aim a stone that crashed into the side-glass of one of the vehicles in the convoy that was returning from Apam. Apparently the person who did the throwing was not a marksman because the head of His Excellency was longitudes away from where the stone landed… In any case, the attempt is a dastardly one that must be condemned in no uncertain terms…
“Professor Adu Boahen of Kukrudu fame, I hear, also had a little showdown with some school children at Akatsi or Anfoega in the Volta Region. In spite another of the fact that he had written history books for the kids to learn to gain knowledge, they apparently did not like the Kukrudu slogan and therefore sought to sack the history pundit from their territory. I think that area had already been colonised by the Akatamanso politicians, so it seemed to the children that Adu Boahen was trespassing…
“Perhaps, he did not pour libation to the gods of Eweland before embarking on the journey to go and preach to the people the political philosophy behind the word Kukrudu. But I must say that such reception to political campaigners is not commendable.”
I then cautioned with special reference to the stone-throwers, “To prevent violence, heads of political parties should undertake the task of admonishing their supporters to eschew violence, because when you throw a stone at somebody, next time someone will not throw a stone at you, but boulder. The person whose head you hit with a stone will continue to live, but when a boulder lands square on your head, it is most likely you’ll live to witness the handing over ceremony on January 7.
Because of the nature of the politics during those days, many homes witnessed turbulent times. Under the heading CALM AND THE BITTER LES- SONS, Sikaman Palaver revealed:
“Since the ban on politics was lifted, many homes have been on fire. Some men have even stopped giving chop money because they consider their wives as politically mad. If for instance the man tried to make the point that akatamanso will bring prosperity, the wife will insist that kukrudu is rather the way to heaven.
POLITICAL VISION
“…A man will growl at his wife like an underfed lion: “In the name of the elephant which has political vi- sion, I’ve placed a ban on the use of umbrellas in this house. I swear by my grandfather’s hernia that if you do not comply I’ll turn your neck’.”
People were not only concerned about politics during 1992. Accidents had occurred the previous year and there was the need to introduce road safety awareness throughout the country, a task which was undertaken by Meridian Tobacco Co. Ltd which organised a Safe Driver competition.
Sikaman Palava acknowledged their efforts. “Whenever I board a vehicle, the first thing I always want to look at is the driver’s head. If the head is un-kempt, it means he is a careless fellow. If he has normal haircut, finely combed, it means I’m quite safe. If he wears punk, it probably means that he doesn’t have a driving license and is therefore a potential killer.
“When the driver is, however, a sakora, then I’m always prepared for anything including death. The whole palaver is that when a sakora man is at the wheels and is driving at about 90 kilometres per hour, there is every likelihood that the breeze circumnavigating about his naked head will make him feel like having his siesta.”
For sure, when driving at top speed while taking siesta can be the most dangerous risk imaginable.
Meridian Tobacco Company identified the various reasons why road accidents were rampant. A safe driver competition in 1991 and 1992 has brought a great measure of safe driving awareness from which the country has benefited.
As the year 1992 gradually wore on, politicians entertained high hopes and wishes upon which Sikaman Palava commented in an article titled ‘POLITICAL HOPES AND WISHES.’
“The funny thing about elections is that no contestant ever believes he’d lose until the final results show that all is not well. And in such an event, the loser is likely to blame the Mallam who divined that it would be a landslide in his favour. Another loser will blame the local pastor who prayed for him, and at least one loser is likely to get angry with the tigari- man who gave him 101 per cent assurance.
“When you become a losing contestant, it becomes very difficult to go back home with a smiling face. You’re likely to go home quietly and make straight for bed without taking supper. And your wife is certain to ask you whether you are on hunger strike.”
It was from the time when the parties started holding congress and electing presidential candidates that many politicians started getting disappointed. After congress, many went back home trying to force a smile and were welcomed back from the ordeal by their young children.
“Dad, you look tired, but I understand. Politics is not a small thing,” your son would say. “I realised that the number of votes you had was nowhere near the top. In fact you were coming right from the bottom which means you are a good swimmer. Good swimmers normally come from behind, and I’ll advise you to start preparing for the next Olympics. As for politics, I’m not sure you’ll shine.”
The review of the past year
continues next week.
By Merari Alomele
Features
Ghanaian migrants and health surveys in Finland
A few weeks ago, I wrote about cancer awareness among Ghanaian migrants in Finland. The piece was a move away from my usual focus on personalities or groups and their accomplishments within the Ghanaian community in Finland.
Today, I focus again on a health issue because I recently chanced on a report about a study to be conducted soon to test the health of individuals in Finland.
The story said that the Finnish Institute for Health and Welfare (THL) will soon (this autumn/August-October) invite 64,000 adults to participate in an extensive survey on health, welfare and service experiences (see https://thl.fi/).
Immediately when I saw that report, my mind went to questions about the participation of immigrants, Ghanaian/African migrants in particular.
The Finnish health system and health surveys
Finland has a very good healthcare delivery system which is accessible to all residents in the country.
According to the report, the THL will be studying the well-being of adults living in Finland and their experiences of health and social services.
The report said the extensive Healthy Finland Survey is carried out every two years.
The invitation to the survey will be sent to 64,000 randomly selected people aged 20 or over from around Finland this autumn.
The survey collects up-to-date information on the health status of adults living in Finland as well as their lifestyles, quality of life, functional capacity, and experiences of social and health services.
Many migrants, including those in the Ghanaian community, are aware of health opportunities in Finland and are expected to take advantage of such prospects.
When I saw the report, the question that kept coming to my mind was how Ghanaian migrants could become aware of such a survey and participate in it. I hope they will be lucky enough to fall within those randomly selected. I urge those selected to take the survey seriously and participate actively.
A healthy migrant community
A healthy migrant community is important and beneficial to the host society as a whole. As I have said previously, in Finland public agencies, migrant associations and other non-governmental organisations (NGOs) have been giving health information through various channels— webinars, mass media (radio, TV, as well as the new media and others), etc. Such actions are very helpful to people.
Indeed the social media outlets have become an important means for disseminating information and would be a key medium through which migrant groups or associations and other institutions could educate people.
Generally, migrant associations create awareness among their members and other migrants, usually in collaboration with some Finnish institutions, and are thus an important tool for several migrants to be positively active and to get their interest and concerns heard.
As I wrote previously, the role of migrant associations acting as bridge-builders for the integration and inclusion of migrants through participation in the decision making process and by acting as a representative voice is highly appreciated in Finland.
A positive outlook
Ghanaian and other African migrants in Finland are generally keeping a positive mind and hoping for the best in life.
They know that the Finnish healthcare system, one of the best in the world, has a comprehensive healthcare service that caters for every resident in the country.
I hope this trust in the Finnish health system by arguably many migrants can be translated into the migrants seeing the need to participate actively in surveys to help improve immigrants’ health statuses.
Migrants know that as residents they can count on and readily access good healthcare service delivery in Finland. All they need to do is to go for regular medical checks and participate in such health surveys so that their health statuses can be known and action taken without delay if there is any problem that is identified. Thank you!
GHANA MATTERS COLUMN
With Dr Perpetual Crentsil
Features
Just in time –Part 2
A couple of weeks later, Esaaba left home later than usual, and stopped by his service centre on her way to work. He smiled with surprise, but she noted that he was not exactly thrilled to see me.
‘I thought you would be at work by now,’ he said. ‘Yes, normally I would. But I decided to wait so that I could stop by and see you.’ ‘Thanks a lot. I appreciate that. Do come in.’ They walked past the several cars with their bonnets open, young men busy at work, and they responded to her greeting.
They entered his office, a medium sized air-conditioned room with a laptop computer on the desk, a fridge, and a shelf behind his desk with files and manuals. There was also a big open cupboard with what I guessed were spare parts. ‘So, you are welcome. Would you like some tea?’
‘No thanks. I already had breakfast. Actually, I won’t be more than a few minutes.’ ‘Okay. So, now you know where I work. You already know that I service German cars.
Most of my customers are owners of Mercedes, BMW and Golf. I get several others but these three are the main ones. I’ve been here two years, and I’m getting busier every week.’ ‘Glad to hear that. Good to know that you are finding your work productive.’
‘Well, yes, except that sometimes Ghanaian customers are a little difficult. I’m used to working with time and precision. Everything I do here is IT oriented, but our people are a little slow when it comes to technology. And when it comes to the staff, that’s a whole big issue. It’s often difficult to get them to understand simple processes.
You have to keep saying the same thing over and over again, until they get it. And I think Ghanaians are lazy. You have to virtually push them to work. Sorry, I shouldn’t be complaining like this to you, certainly not on your first visit’. ‘Of course it’s fine.
These are real everyday issues you can’t ignore. But I’m sure that as time goes on, you are developing your own mechanisms of dealing with people, even difficult customers and employees. Eventually you will win them over.’ ‘Well, I hope so. Sometimes it’s very difficult. Anyway, so how do you normally get to work?’
‘There’s a taxi rank just some fifty metres away from here. The taxi drops me very close to my department. And it’s the same coming back home. So I don’t have any transport issues’.
‘Okay, let me see you off before it gets too late.’
He saw her off and wished her a good day, and as she walked to join the taxi she reflected on her impressions of him at work. It was good to know that he was doing something productive, but while she understood that his German education and training inclined him towards punctuality and efficiency, she thought that anyone working in our environment, especially a Ghanaian, should find a way to handle customers and employees.
Customers would flock to you if they knew that you were efficient and punctual, so that could be an advantage. And employees could always be trained to work the way the employer wanted, depending on the motivation and the style used. Those were her early impressions, but she was quite willing to give Stanley time to come across with his plans for the future.
Some two months after he proposed, he had not said anything else. They met as usual and chatted over all manner of things, but he avoided the relationship issue. Esaaba started thinking of dropping hints about the subject, but one morning he stopped by the house as she was about to leave for work, and announced that he was going to Germany ‘for a few months.’
He was going to prepare to fully settle back in Ghana. He apologised for not informing her earlier, but he had had to take the decision in a hurry. He would call regularly, of course, and discuss everything’ then he was gone.
He called some three days after he arrived in Germany, and promised to call regularly. He honoured his promise, and called for a couple of months, mostly to talk about the two German brothers he was working with.
They had a great working relationship, and he hoped to get them interested in investing in Ghana. He believed that in spite of the challenges, Ghana was a very viable place to invest, and he was going to work hard to succeed in Ghana.
Quite a few Germany based Ghanaians had returned home to invest, and some were doing extremely well. He mentioned Kwasi Okyere, who had opened an organic farm with two branches in the Central and Eastern Regions, and was supplying vegetables to the supermarkets.
Then there was Dan Appiah, who was bringing rebuilt tractors for sale to Ghanaian farmers, and was struggling to meet the numerous orders he had received. There were many success stories to inspire him, he said, and he was certainly going to make it in Ghana.
And to top it all, he had met a beautiful lady, just the type of woman he wanted.
Esaaba found those words really heart-warming, but she was not thrilled. She hoped and prayed that he would be able to achieve those objectives. She tried to encourage him, saying for example that having already been to Ghana to start working in his preferred line of business, all he needed was to prepare adequately and come back with full vigour.
And fortunately too, he had two wealthy partners who would provide him with technical and financial support. With hard work, he could win jobs from the big industrial and commercial organizations.
After two months, however, he fell silent. She waited for a couple of weeks, and dropped a few WhatsApp messages. But even though he opened them, he did not reply. She called on two occasions, and he did not answer. So she decided to wait for a while.
Perhaps he needed some time to sort himself out’. Regular communication from her could give the impression that he was obliged to hurry up and come to Ghana to be with her. She dropped a few messages to greet him and hope that he was doing well. Then she stopped.
Her parents may have gotten some hint from somewhere, because they started asking. ‘How are things going between you and Stanley?’ Mama asked. ‘I haven’t heard from him in a couple of months. But before then, things were going very well’. ‘How can that be, Esaaba? You mean things were going well, then all of a sudden, he went quiet, and you haven’t heard from him for two months?’
‘That’s exactly what happened Mama’. We had been chatting regularly. He had been telling me about his work in Germany, the two brothers he was working with, and how he was hoping to get them interested in working with him in Ghana. He was looking forward to resuming work here in a big way. He counted himself lucky to have a girl like me as his support.
On my part I assured him that he had done well to have started the service centre. With his knowledge of the market, he only needed good preparation to come and excel. Everything was going well as far as our conversations are concerned. When he stopped communicating. I kept sending him messages and calling. He never replied any of them’.
‘Listen, Esaaba’, Dada said. ‘We are your parents, so tell us exactly what has happened. Are you sure you haven’t had arguments with him which have caused him to back off? You know you are a very confident person. Sometimes you need to humble yourself a little, especially when it comes to men and relationships. Tell us, what exactly happened?’
‘Dada, are you telling me that I am telling lies? Well, fortunately my phone records all conversations, so I can play all of them for you now. I can also show you the WhatsApp messages we have exchanged. Let me get them all for you now’. ‘You don’t need to get angry,’ Mama said. ‘We only want the best for you. That’s why …..’
‘You want the best for me, so you must tell me that I am lying? I don’t know what is happening with Stanley in Hamburg. Perhaps he is facing challenges with the job, perhaps he has found new partners, perhaps he is moving to a new house and needs to raise money. It could be anything.
Why should you assume that I’m lying? And Dada, I don’t think it is fair that you should imply that I have said something to offend Stanley because I am a confident person. Stanley is an individual with the right to make his own choices. I don’t control him. I think I have said enough’. ‘Then we will call him ourselves and find out what is happening’, he said as I walked away. ‘Here is his number’, Esaaba said as she took a pen tore a sheet from her note pad. ‘Call him’.
The following evening, as Esaaba walked home from the taxi rank, she saw a note from Stanley, stopped to read it and, shaking her head, walked home very angry. She entered the hall and found Baaba chatting with their parents. ‘Good evening’, she greeted, trying to sound warm. ‘How is it, Baaba?’ ‘All is well.
I hear things are not going well with you and Stanley. Anything the matter?’ I don’t know on what basis you concluded that things are not going well. I haven’t heard from him in a couple of months.
I don’t know what challenges he’s facing’. ‘But if he hasn’t called in two months then something is surely wrong. I’m sure there’s something you are not telling us’. ‘Why don’t you go to hell, Baaba? If you won’t mind your own business, then go to hell’.
‘Your sister is asking such a harmless question, and you ask her to go to hell, Esaaba?’ ‘Please, Dada, I think I need to go somewhere quickly and sort myself out before things go badly wrong.
I have just received this note from Stanley. Let me read it to you: “Esaaba, you father called me last night to ask about my plans and the arrangements for our marriage. I think I need to tell you that your parents are interfering in my personal life, and I don’t like it. I must tell you that the reason why I bought you the ring and made that unusual proposal is that they called me and virtually told me to come and marry you. Kindly tell them to get off my back. Regards”.
So Mama and Dada, you think you want the best for me? Thank you for what you’ve done. And Beesiwa, go to hell. I will be moving out of this house, very soon’. Then she walked off.
Ekow De Heer
