Relationship
Qualities to look out for in your marriage counsellor
As you begin your journey of marriage, remember that seeking help from a professional marriage therapist or counsellor can be a valuable asset to your relationship.
I admit there are so many characteristics you would have to consider when choosing your marriage therapist or counsellor. Therefore, I will start by introducing you to the core qualities that your marriage counsellor or therapist must possess:
1. Professional qualifications and credentials
Check the counsellor’s qualifications, such as their educational background, counselling certifications, and any specialised training in marriage counselling (for instance, Counselor Prince & Associates Consult’s ‘Certificate in Counselling and Marriage Therapy,’ which is accredited by Ghana Psychology Council (GPC).
Ensure the therapist or counsellor has appropriate credentials and is licensed or at least certified. For instance, if you are in Ghana, the counsellor must be licensed with the Ghana Psychology Council (GPC).
2. Rapport building and creating a welcoming atmosphere
Your marriage therapist or counsellor should possess the critical skills of building rapport and creating a welcoming environment for you and your partner.
Imagine you and your partner walk into a marriage counsellor’s office for the first time. You are nervous, vulnerable, and unsure about what lies ahead.
It is important that the counsellor you choose understands the value of rapport building and creating a warm and inviting space for you both.
Rapport building is the foundation of any successful counselling relationship. It is all about your counsellor establishing a connection, trust, and understanding with you and your partner.
Creating a welcoming atmosphere goes beyond having a cozy office or providing refreshments. It is about making you and your partner feel valued and respected from the moment you step through the door.
Your counsellor should start by greeting you and your partner with a smile and a genuine welcome. They must show sincere concern, making it clear that your struggles matter to them.
The counsellor must pay attention to their own body language, ensuring it conveys openness and approachability. For instance, a simple gesture like offering you a comfortable seat or a bottle of water can go a long way in making you feel at ease.
Finally, remember that building a rapport and creating a welcoming atmosphere is an ongoing process. That means your counsellor must continuously check in with you and your partner, ask for your feedback, and adjust their approach accordingly.
3. Strong communication skills
A good marriage counsellor or therapist should have excellent active listening skills, questioning skills, clarification and reflecting skills, as well as general communication skills, just to mention a few.
Your counsellor should be able to facilitate constructive dialogue between you and your partner.
For your counsellor to be a good listener, they must make you feel heard and understood. This means giving you undivided attention, maintaining eye contact, and responding empathically to your concerns.
The counsellor should be able to articulate his or her thoughts, wisdom and guidance to you and your partner in a clear manner.
4. Impartial and non-judgmental attitude
The counsellor or therapist should have the ability to create a safe and non-judgmental space for you. It is essential that you and your partner feel comfortable sharing your thoughts, emotions, and concerns without fear of criticism or condemnation.
A skilled counsellor should maintain a non-judgmental and objective stance when helping you.
A professional marriage counsellor will remain neutral and unbiased throughout the therapeutic process. They will not take sides or favour one partner over the other.
Instead, they will listen to both of you attentively, offer insights, and guide you towards a deeper understanding of your relationship dynamics. This objectivity helps ensure fairness and creates a safe space for both of you to express your feelings and concerns.
Remember, the journey to growth and experiencing a happy and fulfilling marriage begins with you feeling safe and well supported.
To be continued …
Source: Excerpts from ‘Preparing for a Happy and Fulfilling Marriage’ Book by REV. COUNSELOR PRINCE OFFEI (Psychotherapist and Marriage Therapist). https://counselorprinceass.wixsite.com/edu-counseling-psych
https://princeoffei22.wixsite. com/website
COUNSELOR PRINCE & ASSOCIATES CONSULT (CPAC)
Relationship
Marriage is a cultural union
Marriage is a cultural union
Marriage is often considered a cultural union; because it is a social institution that is deeply rooted in cultural norms and traditions. In many cultures, marriage is not just a union between two individuals, but a union between families, tribes, or even entire communities.
Marriage is a cultural union or institution that varies across different societies and cultures, but it typically involves certain common elements, such as a public declaration of commitment, a legal contract, and a religious or social ceremony.
In many cultures, marriage is also closely tied to religious or spiritual beliefs, and may involve elaborate ceremonies and rituals that reflect these beliefs. For example, in African and Christian dominated cultures, the wedding ceremony is usually seen as a sacred union between a man and woman, and involves a number of traditional rituals and customs that symbolise the couple’s commitment to each other and to their shared spiritual path.
The cultural significance of marriage varies widely across cultures, but some common themes include the formation of social bonds, the establishment of a family unit, and the preservation of cultural values and traditions. Marriage is often seen as a way to ensure the continuation of a particular culture or way of life, as well as a way to transmit cultural knowledge and values to future generations.
Generally, marriage can be seen as a cultural union because it is deeply embedded in the social and cultural fabric of many societies around the world. It serves as a powerful symbol of social cohesion and continuity, and reflects the values and beliefs of the communities in which it is practised.
In Christianity, marriage is often viewed as a sacred covenant between a man and a woman, established by God for the purpose of companionship, procreation, and the establishment of a family unit. While marriage is viewed as a union between two individuals, it is also seen as a union between God, the couple, and their community. The Christian view of marriage as a cultural union is rooted in the belief that human beings are created in the image of God and are therefore endowed with the capacity for love, relationship, and community.
Marriage is seen as a reflection of the triune nature of God, who exists in a perfect relationship of love and unity between Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Christian teachings emphasise the importance of fidelity, commitment, and self-sacrifice in marriage, and stress the importance of maintaining a strong and healthy relationship between spouses.
In many Christian traditions, marriage is also seen as a sacrament, a sacred rite that confers spiritual grace and blessings on the couple. The wedding ceremony is often conducted in a Church or other religious settings, and may involve rituals and customs that reflect the couple’s Christian faith and commitment to each other.
Essentially, the Christian view of marriage as a cultural union emphasizes the importance of love, commitment, and community in the establishment of a lifelong partnership between a man and a woman. It is seen as a sacred covenant between God, the couple, and their community, and serves as a powerful symbol of the values and beliefs of the Christian faith.
To be continued …
Source: Excerpts from ‘Preparing for a Happy and Fulfilling Marriage’ Book by REV. COUNSELOR PRINCE OFFEI (Psychotherapist and Marriage Therapist). https://counselorprinceass.wixsite.com/edu-counseling-psych
https://princeoffei22.wixsite. com/website-psychologist
https://princeoffei22.wixsite. com/website
COUNSELOR PRINCE & ASSOCIATES CONSULT (CPAC COUNSELLOR TRAINING INSTITUTE)
Relationship
Blended families-tips for easing the transition-Part 2
As divorce is on the increase in numerous places in the world, blended families have become a common type of household. Many families have a lot of difficulties navigating this unique family situation with success.
A major reason is that members of blended families need to make many adjustments in their lives. The transition can be problematic. And trying to force it can breed conflict and resentment.
Last week we looked at four tips that would help ease the transition, this week we continue with another four tips.
5. Keep the biological connections strong
Encourage all the children to keep a close connection to both of their biological parents. It may be difficult when they live different cities, but it is not impossible.
When you are supportive in this way and respectful of the ex-spouses, the children will see that it is not a competition for affection. Rather, it shows them that you truly care about their happiness.
6. Give support to the children who have to live in two households
Show compassion and understanding to the children who have to move back and forth. Do not assume all is fine but be ready to listen when they need you.
They may worry about missing out on something while they are gone. They may also still have a lot of unresolved feelings about the end of their biological parent’s marriage or the death of one of their parents.
The moment of packing up and moving once again can be highly emotional and feel overwhelming to them. Be by their side.
7. Nurture your marriage
Of course, the transition is not just tough on the children but also for you and your spouse. You will need your partner’s support and they need yours. So, do not forget to make time for each other and cultivate closeness. Your relationship needs to be strong to make a success of your new blended family.
Enjoy date nights and keep your bond strong. Your children will naturally fall in place behind your lead.
8. Expect to adjust
With proper help and guidance, children can recover from family disruption. All children experience a difficult adjustment period following a divorce or remarriage.
It takes time, patience, and perhaps some professional assistance, but most children are able to regain their emotional bearings. It is critical that the adults manage their own emotional recovery in order to help the children adjust without trauma.
Source- eddinscounseling.com
