Obaa Yaa
She says the girl is not my child
Dear Obaa Yaa,
My name is Amos, I am not married but have one child who I cater for. Just recently when I sent my child weekly money for her upkeep, her mother asked me not to bother.
She said that the child was not mine and that she was prepared to pay for everything I have spent on them.
Obaa Yaa, life around me now is hell. I can’t come to terms with what she is telling me after taking care of my child for six years.
Obaa Yaa, what can make a woman behave like this? What should do?
Amos,
Kwahu.
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Dear Amos,
I am really sorry for you. However, it is good that this woman is saying something you have not investigated and know for certainty if the child is yours or not. That will keep your mind at rest.
Take a lawyer and send the matter to court. The court will most certainly order a paternity test where you can know your stand as to the parentage of this girl.
If she is yours, you can take legal steps to claim her from the dishonest mother. If it is proved that she is not your child, then you can make your lawyer prepare a bill for the woman to reimburse you for all you have spent on the child.
Obaa Yaa
My husband is always in the bedroom
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I AM 30 and he is 45. We have been married for three years now. The problem I have with my husband is that when he is not at work and he’s home, and always in the bedroom.
You can never see my husband in the sitting room chatting with the children or with me.
And Obaa Yaa, he only tells the children and I that he loves us when he is tipsy or drunk. That is the only time you will see him in a conversation with us.
Do you believe he really means it when he says he loves us in that mood?
Baaba,
Agona Nyakrom.
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Dear Baaba,
Generally, there are many types of personality in everyone and I hope your husband is an introvert. This means he is not the outgoing type and wants to keep to himself either reading or listening to music.
And of course, such a person would need something to stimulate him to be open, expressive and nice, and I guess a little alcohol is doing just that.
If he is not abusing the alcohol, then there is nothing much more to worry about. Be loving and let him be the person God has made him.
Ask the children to go to him anytime he is lonely to share jokes and help them with their homework.
Encourage him to be more communicative and do not nag about him because that will worsen the problem.
Obaa Yaa
Labour ward stories scare me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I JUST missed my period and I know I am pregnant but I am afraid of the repercussions.
It isn’t that there is no money to take care of the pregnancy, but Obaa Yaa, I have heard about all the things that happen at the labour ward.
I want to abort the pregnancy and be fully prepared before getting pregnant again.
I understand it’s a very painful experience and I can’t stand it.
Takyibea,
Eastern Region.
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Dear Takyibea,
YOU have not written your age in the letter so it will be difficult to advise you on procedures to take.
You have also not told me whether or not you are married.
If you are above 21 and married, do not go and abort.
Many women have aborted pregnancies and ended up as barren. Besides, abortion is criminal and you can be prosecuted for it.
If there is money to look after the pregnancy, go ahead and deliver the baby.
Those stories you hear of labour pains should not scare or frighten you.
God takes every woman through it and there is nothing to postpone about it. Unless you do not want to have a baby, you must forget the labour ward stories and be hopeful.
The baby will bring you joy and open more doors for you because children are blessings from God.
Don’t listen to any negative news about child birth.