Obaa Yaa
Should I stick to my plan or listen to my guardians?
Dear ObaaYaa
I was in the third year of SHS when unfortunately, l became pregnant and had to terminate my education.
Though my situation was embarrassing and quite disgraceful, my guardians did not let me down but accepted me and allowed me to stay at home till the time l would be delivered of my baby.
They provided me with everything and really made life comfortable for me throughout the period l was pregnant.
Surprisingly, they gave me the assurance that l would return to school to enable me to continue my education.
Thanks be to God, l was delivered of my baby who is now three months old. My problem now is there is no one at home to take care of the baby because my guardians are workers and my siblings are also not available to assist me in taking care of the baby while l go to school.
Despite this challenge, my guardians are still insisting that l should return to school at all cost and no amount of explanation would help change their decision.
Inasmuch as l would have lovedto be in school, my plea is that l would like to wait till my baby is at least a year old before l return to school.
I am confused and do not know what to do. Should I stick to my plan or listen to my guardians even though l have no one to take care of the baby. Please advise me on what to do.
Akua, Accra.
Dear Akua,
This column would like to commend you for your decision to maintain the pregnancy and praise your guardians who have provided you a serene atmosphere throughout the nine months of pregnancy.
Your letter was silent on your parents, especially your mother who should take care of your child while you return to school.
Granted that your mother is not there, the mother of the gentleman who impregnated you or any close relative of his should also come in to lend their support.
Failure to listen to your guardians, having considered the assistance they have given you so far will be tantamount to ingratitude, and they will not take kindly to it. Their insistence of you returning to school after three months could be linked to the commencement of the academic calendar.
Nursing mothers who work always ensure that they look for somebody to take care of their children while they go to work.
Alternatively, you can also make arrangement and send your baby to a day care centre, provided you have the means to pay for it.
Obaa Yaa
Under pressure from family to marry
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am 38 and single. In spite of the pressure I receive from my mother, I have decided not to marry now until I am financially sound.
It is this same mother of mine who would keep asking me for things even when I am married.
Obaa Yaa, recently my mother actually came to my house with a 10 member delegation from my hometown in the Ashanti Region at dawn.
Their mission was to give me two weeks ultimatum to marry or else they would bring me a wife from the village.
Obaa Yaa, please what should I do?
Akwasi.
Dear Akwasi,
MARRIAGE is not a child’s play. I understand the fact that you want to be financially sound to decide on marriage.
You are not getting younger so try to give ear to what your mother is saying.
No one can force you to marry against your will. Get to your mother with a respectable elder and let her know that she is embarrassing you with her unwarranted demands.
Assure her that in your own good time, you would get married and that you are not prepared to accept any imposition.
Obaa Yaa
He forcibly kissed me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a 20-year-old girl and a virgin. I have made up my mind not to have sex before marriage or involve myself in any immoral acts.
Interestingly, when I turned 25, I met a man who was in his early thirties doing so well with business.
He is very kind, lovely, faithful, caring, humble and God-fearing.
We began dating for some time and because he didn’t ask for sex, I concluded he was the right man for me.
One holiday, we decided to hang out. He proposed marriage to me, when I said yes, he forcibly kissed me.
Looking at things, I am afraid that he will one day forcibly have sex with me.
Should I go on with this relationship?
Annora, Sunyani.
Dear Anora,
YOU are growing and you should be able stand by the decisions you take.
Once this man has forcibly kissed you, what he intends to do next is to have sex with you.
He might be a good man so don’t end the relationship because of the incident that happened.
If you are not ready to marry, do not accept any love proposal from a man.
If you are also interested in him, kindly tell him to do the needful before any other thing.
