Obaa Yaa
Should l take her back after years of separation?
Dear ObaaYaa,
We got married and stayed under the same roof for six years during which God blessed us with two children. Though financial problems hit us hard, the delivery of the children, surprisingly, brought joy into the family.
As the head of the family, l ensured that the basic needs of the family were provided and life went on smoothly despite the hardships we went through.
All along, my wife complained about the harsh economic challenges that the family experienced. But despite the assurances l gave that things would be better, l realised that she was not satisfied with my explanation.
After a brief misunderstanding between us one day, my wife threatened to leave me and the children. Exactly a month after she had issued that threat, another quarrel ensued and she packed her things and left the house.
Five years after, she has returned and pleading that l should take her back.
Having considered the toil and pain that l had single-handedly gone through to cater for the children without her calling or coming round to find out how her children fared was unpardonable.
When l come to think about it, l get sick, worried and very angry about the sort of treatment meted out to us.
Surprisingly, we are both not married. What should l do?
Joseph- Takoradi.
Dear Joseph,
I thank God for the life of your family, especially having taken you and your children through these difficult moments of trials, frustrations and deprivations to reach this stage.
Additionally, you ought to be commended for the ability to withstand the problems associated with single-parenting. I am pretty sure many people would have given you bits and pieces of advice from time to time as regards the sort of action to take in order to address the problem.
Impressed with your spirit of resilience and the love that you have for your children, l have the feeling that you are capable of moving mountains and making things work to perfection.
There is no human perfection on earth and there were occasions that people lost their temper and misbehaved without considering the consequences.
Your former wife allowed anger to take the better part of her, and having come back to her senses, she is pleading for forgiveness. Christians should remember that though sinners, Christ died for their sins, a gesture they do not deserve. So you must also forgive your wife and accept her back for the sake of the children and for the fact that you are both single.
Obaa Yaa
My boss is tormenting me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I have worked in a private environment in Accra for 10 years now. People talk about how stressful it is to work in a private sector but I did not believe it till I had my fair share of experience working with my new boss.
Recently, our boss was transferred and was replaced by a new boss.
In fact, I am finding it difficult to work with him.
Looking at my age, he talks to me like am a small boy and relates to me like a teacher and his pupil.
Sometimes, I feel like hitting him but it is against the rules of our company.
I currently do not have another employment opportunity. What can I do? I can’t cope with his behaviour anymore.
Joe Boy,
Ashiaman.
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Dear Joe Boy,
I am afraid you’d have to cope with your boss for the meantime. Learn to live with the ‘devil’ until you find a way about it.
Just live up to your responsibility; perform your functions to the best of your knowledge and do not misbehave towards him.
If he sees that you are competent, he would begin to respect you. Remember that respect is earned not demanded.
Obaa Yaa
I am in a state of dilemma
Dear Obaa Yaa,
My name is Owusu and I am 35- years -old while my wife is 30 years. We have been married for five years but been together for seven years. We have two children together and they are doing so well in their academics.
My company had a conference at a hotel in Kumasi and four of us from my department were selected to represent the company.
During lunch, I decided to take a stroll and enjoy the scenery around the hotel since it’s my first time there.
As I strolled around, I was shocked to see my wife step out of a car with a young man. They started walking towards the reception of the hotel. The man placed his arms around her waist and they seemed to be enjoying each other’s company.
I froze and felt bad. I wanted to shout and approach them but when I opened my mouth, no words came out and my feet were too heavy to drag. I just watched them in awe as they checked in at the reception and disappeared from my sight.
I am in my mother’s house now, I do not know how I will face her if I eventually go home. I told her my mom needs help with a few things at the house so I will lend a helping hand and also sleep over. I haven’t told anyone but my mom suspects that something is wrong.
I am down right now, my marriage and home seem to be coming to an end. Please what should I do?
Sakyi, Adenta.
Dear Sakyi,
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I understand how you feel and I plead with you to continue to be patient with your wife.
Please try and go home to have a word with her concerning the incident you saw.
Give her the benefit of doubt to explain what she was exactly doing there at that time with the man.
I am pleading with you to give her a second chance but most importantly, kindly inform her parents about it to talk to her.
You can seek the help of a professional counselor and go for therapies with her.
However, if you are not comfortable staying with her, please part ways with her peacefully. You can co-parent your daughter.
