Obaa Yaa
Terminate pregnancy or will not accept baby
Dear Obaa Yaa,
We became lovers after school and this gentleman promised to marry me. With time, l got pregnant but he insisted l should abort the pregnancy since he was unemployed.
l got rid of the pregnancy and this remained a secret between us.
After two years, l became pregnant again and my lover once more suggested that l should abort this second pregnancy which l refused.
He threatened to disown the child if l chose to maintain the pregnancy. l ignored his threats and informed my parents about the mess which l had caused.
Though l was abused and ridiculed, my parents later followed up to the gentleman’s parents who backed their son’s claims that he was not responsible for my pregnancy.
Enraged though, my father decided to accept the child as one of his children.
Having gone through embarrassment and mental agony, my child is doing well in school and this funny man is trying to claim the child.
l have decided not to mind him. Have l taken the right decision?
Marian, Accra.
Dear Marian,
You must be commended for the bold decision you took under this trying conditions. Your parents must also be commended for standing by you to overcome this problem.
The possibility of becoming barren after the second abortion was great, hence your decision was appropriate.
You must ignore this gentleman but if he still insists, your parents should go to court and stop him from harassing you.
Secondly, your parents should calculate the expenditure they had made on you from the time you became pregnant through to the time you were delivered of the child and what you had spent to look after the child and ask the man to pay it all off.
Obaa Yaa
Text message exposes my boyfriend
Dear Obaa Yaa,
My boyfriend told me he was attending the funeral of her late cousin outside Accra and promised to be back the next day.
Initially, the plan was that I would go with him and spend some time with his family since I have a good relationship with them.
I realised he was not comfortable about that and kept telling me that it’s a distant cousin and there was no to need join him.
He said he was going to park his car at the office and join a family bus.
My boyfriend picked a woman from Accra whom he had arranged with during the week.
I called her sister and she told me that his brother came with a lady and also secured themselves a hotel room.
Immediately he arrived, he went straight to the bath house, a lady sent a text message on his phone appreciating the good time they had together.
I read the message when he was having his bath.
Though her sister gave me every information but the text message confirmed everything.
How can he do such a thing? Why did he take another lady to the funeral and left me behind?
Abrefi, Tesano.
*****
Dear Abrefi,
I Understand how you are feeling at the moment because your boyfriend lied to you.
I advise you to confront your boyfriend on the allegations and let him know you have a proof.
He might be pissed off but that is exactly what you should do.
This will give you the opportunity to insist that you will attend all functions with him so that he will not have the opportunity to misbehave.
In confronting him, be calm. Don’t quarrel or nag.
Obaa Yaa
My boss is tormenting me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I have worked in a private environment in Accra for 10 years now. People talk about how stressful it is to work in a private sector but I did not believe it till I had my fair share of experience working with my new boss.
Recently, our boss was transferred and was replaced by a new boss.
In fact, I am finding it difficult to work with him.
Looking at my age, he talks to me like am a small boy and relates to me like a teacher and his pupil.
Sometimes, I feel like hitting him but it is against the rules of our company.
I currently do not have another employment opportunity. What can I do? I can’t cope with his behaviour anymore.
Joe Boy,
Ashiaman.
******
Dear Joe Boy,
I am afraid you’d have to cope with your boss for the meantime. Learn to live with the ‘devil’ until you find a way about it.
Just live up to your responsibility; perform your functions to the best of your knowledge and do not misbehave towards him.
If he sees that you are competent, he would begin to respect you. Remember that respect is earned not demanded.
