Features
The dancing bread seller
During one of my routine brisk walking activity, I happened to observe a scene that was fascinating. A bread seller, a lady in her forties, was dancing to a rap song behind her load of bread on a tray, resting on a table.
I am not sure she could understand a word of what was being rapped but the joy and the attitude she displayed was what caught my attention.
I therefore approached her and interacted briefly with her and a couple of young men who were standing close to her, apparently her customers. The woman’s free spirited attitude was very infectious. It was as if, she did not have anything to worry about in this world.
Reflecting on the woman’s attitude, I recalled a WhatsApp message sent to me by a friend. Motivational speakers, talk about hardwork, acquiring knowledge, education, attitude among others as being the ingredients for success.
WhatsApp message used the Alphabets to reinforce the belief that attitude is the most important ingredient for success. The alphabets were assigned numbers from 1 to 26.
A was assigned number 1, B was assigned number 2, C was assigned number 3 and so on till the last letter Z, was assigned number 26.
HARDWORK is 8+1+18+4+23+15+28+11=98;
KNOWLEDGE is 11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5=96;
EDUCATION is 5+4+21+3+1+20+9+15+14=92;
LEADERSHIP is 12+5+1+4+5+18+19+8+9+16=97; and
ATTITUDE is 1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5=100.
Judging by the logic of rating things by a percentage of 100, it becomes apparent that attitude which sums up to 100, is the most important element for success in various life’s endeavours.
In anything that you do, your attitude will determine its success or otherwise.
The dancing bread seller, demonstrated this by the way she went about selling her bread. She exuded joy, peace and in general a positive attitude to life.
This is the mindset successful people have and this is the way to go in every endeavour of life.
A positive mindset would cause positive declarations to be made and this results in what sociologist call positive thinking which is a very important element towards success in life.
It generates a can do spirit which assists a person to push on despite challenges that comes along the way. Challenges are a part of human endeavours.
Anything one attempts to execute, there is a high probability of encountering challenges but a positive attitude can overcome those challenges.
It will interest you to know that even toddlers have a challenge of being able to sit down without falling. Again to be able to lift themselves up and stand upright is a huge challenge for them not to forget the huge challenge of taking their first steps.
It is a way that nature teaches us to approach life. A careful observation reveals that in their attempt to stand up, they fail several times but they never give up. They have a positive attitude which gives them hope that they will be able to stand up and ultimately walk without assistance from anybody or anything.
This is what keeps them going and helps them to ultimately become successful in taking their first steps.
A look at an aeroplane which is to travel thousands of kilometres from say Ghana to United Kingdom, begins with taking along the runway slowly at first and then gathers speed, lifts up into the air and flies away towards its destination.
Life is usually like that and that is why the good book advises that we should not despise small beginnings and therefore whenever life throws a challenge your way, do not despair but remember the story of the dancing bread seller for motivation, to soldier on.
By Laud Kissi-Mensah
Features
Emotional distortions: The hidden barriers to mental well-being
Emotional distortions are twisted or irrational thought patterns that can have a profound impact on our mental health and well-being.
These distortions can lead to negative emotions, unhealthy behaviours, and strained relationships.
In this article, we will explore the types, causes, and consequences of emotional distortions, as well as strategies for overcoming them.
Types of Emotional Distortions
1. All-or-Nothing Thinking: Seeing things in absolute terms.
2. Catastrophising: Exaggerating potential consequences.
3. Over generalisation: Making sweeping conclusions based on limited evidence.
4. Mind Reading: Assuming others’ thoughts or intentions.
5. Emotional Reasoning: Believing emotions reflect reality.
6. Should Statements: Imposing unrealistic expectations.
7. Labelling: Assigning negative labels to oneself or others.
8. Personalisation: Taking things too personally.
Causes of emotional distortions
1. Childhood experiences
2. Trauma
3. Stress
4. Social learning
5. Cultural influences
6. Genetic predisposition
Consequences of emotional distortions
1. Anxiety and depression
2. Relationship conflicts
3. Low self-esteem
4. Impaired decision-making
5. Substance abuse
6. Physical health problems
Overcoming emotional distortions
1. Cognitive-Behavioural Therapy (CBT): Identifying and challenging distortions.
2. Mindfulness: Practising self-awareness.
3. Self-Reflection: Examining thought patterns.
4. Journaling: Recording and analysing thoughts.
5. Seeking support: Consulting therapists or support groups.
Strategies for Maintaining Mental Well-being
1. Practice self-compassion.
2. Engage in physical activity.
3. Cultivate social connections.
4. Prioritise sleep and nutrition.
5. Seek professional help when needed.
Conclusion
Emotional distortions can have a profound impact on mental health, but they can be overcome. By recognising and challenging these distortions, individuals can develop healthier thought patterns, improve relationships, and enhance overall well-being.
_References_
– Beck, A. T. (1977). Cognitive Behavior Therapy.
– Burns, D. D. (1999). The Feeling Good Handbook.
– American Psychological Association. (2022). Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy.
By Robert Ekow Grimmond-Thompson
Features
Where are we rushing to?
Sometimes you wonder what is going on especially the period before Christmas, in terms of the road incidents.
Yesterday, heading towards town, on my way to lay a wreath on my late wife’s grave, on the anniversary of her burial, I saw cars ahead of me suddenly indicating that they want to move into the middle lane from the inner lane.
I then saw, as I inched along, the reason for moving into the middle lane. Apparently an Uber vehicle had hit the side of a Mercedes Benz car and they were arguing and trying to sort things out.
It was apparent that the cause of the incident was due to rushing to get ahead of the Benz. A few moments of patience from both drivers could have avoided that incident.
It just does not make sense that you are in so much of a hurry that you could not let reason prevail for one of you to exercise restraint, to allow the other vehicle to pass and now both of you are wasting precious time on the road, the very thing you were trying to avoid in the first place.
There is another aspect that is related to this rushing that has to be addressed. People are no longer willing to show empathy with others, such that for a driver to pause for another driver to pass to join the traffic or to cross to the other lane is becoming non-existent these days.
We seem to be selfish in most cases which then causes drivers to rush to join the traffic after waiting and waiting without any one giving him or her the opportunity to move to join the traffic. I was tempted to be callous by ignoring vehicles that wanted to cross from my right to join the opposite traffic coming from the Ghana Law School entrance toward Tema Station, earlier this week due to the behaviour of some drivers toward me.
However, I remembered that I was a Christian and a higher standard of empathy is required of me, so I paused for them to cross from the exit point of the filling station to join the traffic going in the opposite direction.
I nearly knocked down two people earlier this week due to their lack of safety I suppose or is it a lack of focus on the streets. I think safety education needs to be intensified because of what happened on Monday.
How on earth would anyone attempt to cross a road, in front of a vehicle when a traffic light has just shown green? It really beats my imagination but that was exactly what happened and how I did not kill her, is attributable only to divine intervention.
Shortly before this incident, I had narrowly avoided hitting another person, who also crossed in front of me when I was about to join a main road with traffic coming from my left side so I was focused on my left side.
A vehicle was ahead of me and so was waiting to move as soon as it moves. The vehicle moved and just as I was about to follow, this young lady just showed up at my right fender and again I would say it was only by divine intervention that she escaped either serious injury or even death.
The level of selfish considerations in the country is becoming alarming by the day and it is something that must be addressed. The normal Ghanaian attitude of tolerance towards each other is now gradually vanishing from our society and is very worrying.
People are becoming much more inward looking and if something is not going to benefit him or her, they are just not interested. There are a few people who still do what is right and they should be commended to continue the good works.
My advice to my fellow Ghanaians is that, let us stop this rushing when we are driving especially as Christmas is approaching so we can save ourselves from avoidable incidents. God bless.
By Laud Kissi-Mensah