Relationship
Blended families – tips for easing the transition
AS divorce is on the increase in numerous places in the world, blended families have become a common type of household. Many families have a lot of difficulties navigating this unique family situation with success.
A major reason is that members of blended families need to make many adjustments in their lives. The transition can be problematic. And trying to force it can breed conflict and resentment.
Here are some tips to ease the transition:
1. Get on the same page with all parents
To help ease the transition into a blended family, your children need as much stability as possible. Having a consistent routine can help make them feel more secure.
For that very reason, both parents need to sit down together and agree on how they will handle such important matters as allowances, bedtimes, chores, discipline, homework, and rewards.
2. Foster respect
Model the respect you expect from your children by the way you treat your new spouse. Do not allow them to disrespect or disregard their stepparent. If you are the stepparent, it is important that you do not try to force respect by over-disciplining your new stepchildren. A much better approach is allowing each biological parent to discipline their own children until you both have gained the children’s affection and respect. Then, carefully ease into participating in the discipline of each other’s children.
3. Include the children in the transition process
Talk with your children before making major decisions such as living arrangements. Ask them how they could help make their new step-siblings feel welcome and like part of the family.
Take the lead in including your stepchildren in family activities – special ones as well as daily chores. It will keep them from feeling like a guest in the house.
4. Relax, be patient, and don’t set your expectations too high
Do not imagine for a moment that you can just step into a new family and everything will magically come together. Relax, take it slow, and do not try to force instant bonds between everyone. Just be patient and give your new blended family space and time to develop. It could take years for everyone to adjust completely.
Source- eddinscounseling.com