Qualities to look out for in your marriage counsellor –Part 2

A counsellor should be able to provide strong support

 Finding the right marriage coun­sellor can be a daunting task, but it is a crucial step in building a strong, fulfilling relationship. Last week, we discussed the importance of professional qualifications, rapport building, strong communication skills, and an impartial attitude in a mar­riage counsellor.

However, there are more essential qualities to consider when selecting a counsellor to guide you. In this sec­ond part, we will explore additional characteristics which make a mar­riage counsellor effective, supportive and trustworthy.

5. Firm ethical standards and pro­fessionalism

When it comes to matters as deli­cate as your relationship, among oth­er things, ensure that your marriage counsellor adheres to a strict code of ethics and professional practice.

Ethical standards ensure that the counsellor’s actions and decisions are guided by a strong moral compass, promoting trust, respect, and fair­ness.

Professionalism goes hand in hand with ethical standards, as it sets the tone for a productive counselling or therapeutic relationship.

Generally, the counsellor should maintain professional boundaries including confidentiality, respect­ing your privacy and autonomy, and demonstrating integrity in their practice.

Confidentiality simply means that anything you discuss during your sessions will remain confidential unless there is a legal obligation or an imminent risk of harm. Knowing that your personal matters will be kept private allows you and your partner to be open and honest without fear of judgement or breach of trust.

Remember, finding a marriage counsellor with firm ethical standards and professionalism is crucial for your journey towards a happy and fulfilling marriage.

6. Problem-solving skills

Your counsellor should possess ef­fective problem-solving skills required to help you and your partner identify the underlying issues in your rela­tionship, and develop strategies for resolving conflicts and challenges in your relationship.

7. Empathy and compassion

Look for a counsellor who genu­inely cares about your well-being and demonstrates empathy and compas­sion.

Empathy is the ability to put yourself in another person’s shoes and truly understand their emotions and experiences. On the other hand, compassion goes hand in hand with empathy.

Whereas empathy enables the counsellor to understand your emo­tions, compassion takes it a step further by prompting them to act on that understanding with kindness and care.

Compassion is the gentle hand that guides you through difficult conversations, allowing you to face the challenges in your relationship with courage and love. A compassion­ate marriage counsellor will provide strong support, offering a safe haven for you and your partner to express yourselves freely.

Your marriage counsellor should be able to understand and validate your emotions, providing a support­ive space for you to explore your concerns. A professional marriage counsellor will try to understand your perspectives, challenges, and aspi­rations, ensuring that no voice goes unheard.

When choosing a marriage counsel­lor, remember empathy and compas­sion are not just nice-to-have quali­ties; rather they’re essential pillars that contribute to the success of your counselling journey.

8. Cultural sensitivity

Look for a counsellor who has in-depth understanding about your different cultural backgrounds, and is sensitive enough to help you through your diverse cultural beliefs, practic­es, relationship dynamics and chal­lenges.

Marriage counsellors who are cul­turally sensitive take the time to truly understand your individual histories, backgrounds, and values, recognising that these factors shape your per­spective on marriage (whether good or bad). They should honour you and your partner’s differences and work with you to find common ground, fos­tering an environment of inclusivity and acceptance.

To be continued …

Source: Excerpts from ‘Preparing for a Happy and Fulfilling Marriage’ Book by REV. COUNSELOR PRINCE OFFEI (Psychotherapist and Marriage Therapist). https://counselorprin­ceass.wixsite.com/edu-counsel­ing-psych

https://princeoffei22.wixsite. com/website

COUNSELOR PRINCE & ASSOCI­ATES CONSULT (CPAC)