Obaa Yaa
She doesn’t seem to love me
Dear Obaa Yaa
I am a final year student at the Pentecost University where I met a lady and fell in love with her during my internship.
Though I have expressed my feelings to her, she insists we move our relationship at a steady pace.
Honestly, I am not worried about her suggestion for that approach, so far as the relationship is concerned. Why should I pretend to love and be her friend when my feelings for her are more than that?
Meanwhile, there are moments she wants us to go out and have fun, yet when I make advances towards her, she brushes me aside.
What should I do?
Kofi, Accra.
****
Dear Kofi,
I don’t believe you have a problem as your letter explains.
There is nothing wrong to fall in love with this lady and tell her about your feelings.
It is interesting to know that this lady has adopted an intelligent approach of building the friendship gradually.
Note that this relationship could progress into marriage if things go on planned. Do not forget that marriage is a life-long journey which demands you to take the right decision at the right time so that you may not regret in future.
I think her decision to adopt a gradual approach to the relationship will prevent the two of you from taking hasty decisions.
Going out for fun forms part of the gradual approach in a relationship.
Allow her to take a decision at the appropriate time as you do well to also control your feelings.
Obaa Yaa
Under pressure from family to marry
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am 38 and single. In spite of the pressure I receive from my mother, I have decided not to marry now until I am financially sound.
It is this same mother of mine who would keep asking me for things even when I am married.
Obaa Yaa, recently my mother actually came to my house with a 10 member delegation from my hometown in the Ashanti Region at dawn.
Their mission was to give me two weeks ultimatum to marry or else they would bring me a wife from the village.
Obaa Yaa, please what should I do?
Akwasi.
Dear Akwasi,
MARRIAGE is not a child’s play. I understand the fact that you want to be financially sound to decide on marriage.
You are not getting younger so try to give ear to what your mother is saying.
No one can force you to marry against your will. Get to your mother with a respectable elder and let her know that she is embarrassing you with her unwarranted demands.
Assure her that in your own good time, you would get married and that you are not prepared to accept any imposition.
Obaa Yaa
He forcibly kissed me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a 20-year-old girl and a virgin. I have made up my mind not to have sex before marriage or involve myself in any immoral acts.
Interestingly, when I turned 25, I met a man who was in his early thirties doing so well with business.
He is very kind, lovely, faithful, caring, humble and God-fearing.
We began dating for some time and because he didn’t ask for sex, I concluded he was the right man for me.
One holiday, we decided to hang out. He proposed marriage to me, when I said yes, he forcibly kissed me.
Looking at things, I am afraid that he will one day forcibly have sex with me.
Should I go on with this relationship?
Annora, Sunyani.
Dear Anora,
YOU are growing and you should be able stand by the decisions you take.
Once this man has forcibly kissed you, what he intends to do next is to have sex with you.
He might be a good man so don’t end the relationship because of the incident that happened.
If you are not ready to marry, do not accept any love proposal from a man.
If you are also interested in him, kindly tell him to do the needful before any other thing.