Obaa Yaa
Can l marry this lady?
This lady and l belonged to the youth group of our church and we became very close in the process and this led me to develop an interest in her.
Going by the advice of my parents that l should do well to keep my moral life above reproach, l ensured that l did not take advantage of any of the girls in church.
I decided to study the lifestyle of this lady after sometime before l will make a definite decision as to whether l will marry her.
With time, l discovered to my surprise that this lazy is the type who will not lift a finger in the house and does not know how to prepare food.
Though l am always in her company together with her elder sister, it has never crossed my mind to propose love to her as a voice kept telling me to take my time.
It was not quite long when l became aware of the enviable qualities in the elder sister and naturally, my attention was drawn to her.
l have decided to marry this elder sister instead of the younger one l had fixed my eyes on.
Though l have made up my mind to marry, l have not disclosed my intention to either of them.
Will l be wrong if l decide to marry this lady instead?
William, Cape Coast.
Dear William,
How l wished the youth copied your example because this is the best way to study people, especially someone you will spend the rest of your life with.
That is why marriage counselors and parents always caution the youth to distant themselves from premarital sex because it is a way of promoting promiscuity and the complex problems associated with it. An intercourse would have made it impossible for you to identify her shortfalls and probably end relations with her.
It would have been impossible for you to marry this second lady if you had had an affair with the younger sister.
You are at liberty to inform this lady of your decision to marry her. The problem would have arisen if you had promised to marry the younger sister who caught your attention at the first instance.
Obaa Yaa
Under pressure from family to marry
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am 38 and single. In spite of the pressure I receive from my mother, I have decided not to marry now until I am financially sound.
It is this same mother of mine who would keep asking me for things even when I am married.
Obaa Yaa, recently my mother actually came to my house with a 10 member delegation from my hometown in the Ashanti Region at dawn.
Their mission was to give me two weeks ultimatum to marry or else they would bring me a wife from the village.
Obaa Yaa, please what should I do?
Akwasi.
Dear Akwasi,
MARRIAGE is not a child’s play. I understand the fact that you want to be financially sound to decide on marriage.
You are not getting younger so try to give ear to what your mother is saying.
No one can force you to marry against your will. Get to your mother with a respectable elder and let her know that she is embarrassing you with her unwarranted demands.
Assure her that in your own good time, you would get married and that you are not prepared to accept any imposition.
Obaa Yaa
He forcibly kissed me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a 20-year-old girl and a virgin. I have made up my mind not to have sex before marriage or involve myself in any immoral acts.
Interestingly, when I turned 25, I met a man who was in his early thirties doing so well with business.
He is very kind, lovely, faithful, caring, humble and God-fearing.
We began dating for some time and because he didn’t ask for sex, I concluded he was the right man for me.
One holiday, we decided to hang out. He proposed marriage to me, when I said yes, he forcibly kissed me.
Looking at things, I am afraid that he will one day forcibly have sex with me.
Should I go on with this relationship?
Annora, Sunyani.
Dear Anora,
YOU are growing and you should be able stand by the decisions you take.
Once this man has forcibly kissed you, what he intends to do next is to have sex with you.
He might be a good man so don’t end the relationship because of the incident that happened.
If you are not ready to marry, do not accept any love proposal from a man.
If you are also interested in him, kindly tell him to do the needful before any other thing.
