Obaa Yaa
Can lost wedding ring spark problem in marriage?
Dear ObaaYaa,
A close friend recently lost her wedding ring on a journey and some of us initially did not accord the problem the importance it deserved. However, having considered the tears which dripped from her eyes and the perspiration that had engulfed her made me feel sad about the incident.
This incident set me thinking about what might have caused her to perspire profusely when she discovered that her ring had gotten missing.
Though the bus in which we were travelling had covered some kilometres from where she suspected the wedding ring fell, she insisted to alight and our driver obliged to wait for her.
Thank God she found the ring at the place she suspected it might have fallen and the spontaneous joy that filled us on receipt of the news was quite refreshing.
Can the loss of this ring spark a problem at home since it was a mere accident?
Emelia, Accra.
Dear Emelia,
This column would like to commend you for sharing in the grief of your friend. Every human or married person in the right sense must be worried for the loss of a wedding ring.
Though the incident looks like an ordinary misfortune, it has different connotations which could be interpreted differently.
Additionally, the shedding of copious tears by this woman was to tell the world the sort of husband she had and the reaction which awaited her at home.
On the contrary, a discerning husband who is not jealous and understands issues will consider the problem a misfortune and would not hesitate to sympathise with the wife and quickly arrange to buy a new ring for her but the same cannot be said of other men.
Others will infer that the woman could possibly remove the ring to enable her to have an illicit affair and this will spark a serious quarrel which could lead to divorce.
Obaa Yaa
Under pressure from family to marry
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am 38 and single. In spite of the pressure I receive from my mother, I have decided not to marry now until I am financially sound.
It is this same mother of mine who would keep asking me for things even when I am married.
Obaa Yaa, recently my mother actually came to my house with a 10 member delegation from my hometown in the Ashanti Region at dawn.
Their mission was to give me two weeks ultimatum to marry or else they would bring me a wife from the village.
Obaa Yaa, please what should I do?
Akwasi.
Dear Akwasi,
MARRIAGE is not a child’s play. I understand the fact that you want to be financially sound to decide on marriage.
You are not getting younger so try to give ear to what your mother is saying.
No one can force you to marry against your will. Get to your mother with a respectable elder and let her know that she is embarrassing you with her unwarranted demands.
Assure her that in your own good time, you would get married and that you are not prepared to accept any imposition.
Obaa Yaa
He forcibly kissed me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a 20-year-old girl and a virgin. I have made up my mind not to have sex before marriage or involve myself in any immoral acts.
Interestingly, when I turned 25, I met a man who was in his early thirties doing so well with business.
He is very kind, lovely, faithful, caring, humble and God-fearing.
We began dating for some time and because he didn’t ask for sex, I concluded he was the right man for me.
One holiday, we decided to hang out. He proposed marriage to me, when I said yes, he forcibly kissed me.
Looking at things, I am afraid that he will one day forcibly have sex with me.
Should I go on with this relationship?
Annora, Sunyani.
Dear Anora,
YOU are growing and you should be able stand by the decisions you take.
Once this man has forcibly kissed you, what he intends to do next is to have sex with you.
He might be a good man so don’t end the relationship because of the incident that happened.
If you are not ready to marry, do not accept any love proposal from a man.
If you are also interested in him, kindly tell him to do the needful before any other thing.
