Obaa Yaa
My advice to young ladies
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a 32-year- old graduate from one of the universities in Ghana. I deem it necessary to sound a word of caution to young ladies to concentrate on whatever they are doing and not to follow boys.
I was in love with one of my course mates though we were careful not to indulge in sex, we got to a point where complacency took the greater part of us and l got pregnant.
My pregnancy took me by surprise and the serene academic environment suddenly changed and l became confused.
In my confused state l considered many options but the need to cause abortion was on top of the list. Since l was at home when the pregnancy set in, my mother did not find it difficult to discover the mess l had landed in.
The cunning way she posed the question to me made it impossible for me to deny. With this discovery l decided to maintain the pregnancy and defer my course.
Though my boyfriend was not financially sound, l accepted odd jobs to enable me to go through the period until l was delivered of my baby.
Fortunately, my mother took care of my child while l returned to school and successfully completed with a good grade.
However, l must warn that it was not easy since l put a lot of stress on myself and on my parents.
I wish to advise young girls to concentrate on their studies and refrain from engaging in pre-marital sex, since this could end their education for ever.
Beatrice, Accra.
Dear Beatrice,
Experience is the best teacher and it is good to share your bitter experience with young girls who are growing and likely to pass through the problem you had.
You are lucky to have parents who were considerate and accepted despite the problem. I think it is essential to take her advice since you may not be as fortunate as she was.
Concentrate on your studies to avert embarrassment from boyfriends some of whom may disown the pregnancy and make you look disappointed before your parents.
Obaa Yaa
Under pressure from family to marry
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am 38 and single. In spite of the pressure I receive from my mother, I have decided not to marry now until I am financially sound.
It is this same mother of mine who would keep asking me for things even when I am married.
Obaa Yaa, recently my mother actually came to my house with a 10 member delegation from my hometown in the Ashanti Region at dawn.
Their mission was to give me two weeks ultimatum to marry or else they would bring me a wife from the village.
Obaa Yaa, please what should I do?
Akwasi.
Dear Akwasi,
MARRIAGE is not a child’s play. I understand the fact that you want to be financially sound to decide on marriage.
You are not getting younger so try to give ear to what your mother is saying.
No one can force you to marry against your will. Get to your mother with a respectable elder and let her know that she is embarrassing you with her unwarranted demands.
Assure her that in your own good time, you would get married and that you are not prepared to accept any imposition.
Obaa Yaa
He forcibly kissed me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a 20-year-old girl and a virgin. I have made up my mind not to have sex before marriage or involve myself in any immoral acts.
Interestingly, when I turned 25, I met a man who was in his early thirties doing so well with business.
He is very kind, lovely, faithful, caring, humble and God-fearing.
We began dating for some time and because he didn’t ask for sex, I concluded he was the right man for me.
One holiday, we decided to hang out. He proposed marriage to me, when I said yes, he forcibly kissed me.
Looking at things, I am afraid that he will one day forcibly have sex with me.
Should I go on with this relationship?
Annora, Sunyani.
Dear Anora,
YOU are growing and you should be able stand by the decisions you take.
Once this man has forcibly kissed you, what he intends to do next is to have sex with you.
He might be a good man so don’t end the relationship because of the incident that happened.
If you are not ready to marry, do not accept any love proposal from a man.
If you are also interested in him, kindly tell him to do the needful before any other thing.
