Obaa Yaa
Poverty is preventing me from marrying
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I was in two serious relationships, we loved each other and had wanted to marry but this could not go on as we had planned.
Though l was disturbed when l broke up with the lady in my first relationship, l felt very bad when the second one also ended abruptly.
But l must be quick to point out that my inability to support the two ladies caused the break up in the two relationships.
I made the necessary efforts to get a job in order to improve on my economic fortunes but things could not work out well.
Unfortunately, other men who were ready to marry succeeded in snatching the ladies from me. The situation has left me under pressure and has given me a lot to think about.
The second lady said she loved me but my inability to secure a job caused her to accept the proposal from the other man. She confided in me that she still loved me despite all that had happened between us.
According to her she had to accept the proposal from the husband because of too much pressure mounted on her by her parents.
Given the opportunity to make her decision, she would accept to marry me but was afraid of what her parents would say.
What should l do?
Tawiah, Accra
Dear Tawiah,
I find your letter quite disturbing because of the series of disappointments you have had so far.
It is good to be forthright in this matter and you must be commended for identifying the cause of ypour problem.
Though you are making frantic efforts to secure a job in order to stop the recurrent problem of unsuccessful marriages, it is believed that you have the prerequisite qualification and luck will surely shine on you one day.
Having accepted to marry that man should be enough to sever relations with your former girlfriend who can easily find trouble for you.
Obaa Yaa
Under pressure from family to marry
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am 38 and single. In spite of the pressure I receive from my mother, I have decided not to marry now until I am financially sound.
It is this same mother of mine who would keep asking me for things even when I am married.
Obaa Yaa, recently my mother actually came to my house with a 10 member delegation from my hometown in the Ashanti Region at dawn.
Their mission was to give me two weeks ultimatum to marry or else they would bring me a wife from the village.
Obaa Yaa, please what should I do?
Akwasi.
Dear Akwasi,
MARRIAGE is not a child’s play. I understand the fact that you want to be financially sound to decide on marriage.
You are not getting younger so try to give ear to what your mother is saying.
No one can force you to marry against your will. Get to your mother with a respectable elder and let her know that she is embarrassing you with her unwarranted demands.
Assure her that in your own good time, you would get married and that you are not prepared to accept any imposition.
Obaa Yaa
He forcibly kissed me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a 20-year-old girl and a virgin. I have made up my mind not to have sex before marriage or involve myself in any immoral acts.
Interestingly, when I turned 25, I met a man who was in his early thirties doing so well with business.
He is very kind, lovely, faithful, caring, humble and God-fearing.
We began dating for some time and because he didn’t ask for sex, I concluded he was the right man for me.
One holiday, we decided to hang out. He proposed marriage to me, when I said yes, he forcibly kissed me.
Looking at things, I am afraid that he will one day forcibly have sex with me.
Should I go on with this relationship?
Annora, Sunyani.
Dear Anora,
YOU are growing and you should be able stand by the decisions you take.
Once this man has forcibly kissed you, what he intends to do next is to have sex with you.
He might be a good man so don’t end the relationship because of the incident that happened.
If you are not ready to marry, do not accept any love proposal from a man.
If you are also interested in him, kindly tell him to do the needful before any other thing.
