Obaa Yaa
Should I wait for him
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I have been in a relationship with a guy for the past two years and the only relative he introduced me to, was his uncle.
A month to our wedding, I realised our communication style began to go sour as we didn’t talk like we used to. Three days to our wedding, I didn’t hear from him and all the communication channels I tried, proved futile. Therefore, I cancelled the marriage and till date i have not heard from him.
Months later, I chanced upon him and his family (wife and children) at the mall. He begged me not to create a scene, therefore we agreed to meet later that evening.
When we met, he confessed that I was the one whom he dearly loved however, he was with the woman for some benefits. Thus, he would divorce her after claiming the benefits.
Please do you think I should wait for him?
Abena Tetteh,
Prampram.
Dear Abena,
Marriage is principally based on trust, mutual love and tolerance, therefore, if these points are missing, those involved in the marriage are bound to face challenges.
Thank God that you have identified the true nature of this false lover.
It is not true that he will marry you when he gets the benefits he is looking for.
Do not wait for him because it presupposes that he will abandon you in the future if another lover promises him attractive benefits. Keep in mind that he has children.
In your next relationship, try to do detailed background checks on the person before you commit yourself fully.
Obaa Yaa
Under pressure from family to marry
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am 38 and single. In spite of the pressure I receive from my mother, I have decided not to marry now until I am financially sound.
It is this same mother of mine who would keep asking me for things even when I am married.
Obaa Yaa, recently my mother actually came to my house with a 10 member delegation from my hometown in the Ashanti Region at dawn.
Their mission was to give me two weeks ultimatum to marry or else they would bring me a wife from the village.
Obaa Yaa, please what should I do?
Akwasi.
Dear Akwasi,
MARRIAGE is not a child’s play. I understand the fact that you want to be financially sound to decide on marriage.
You are not getting younger so try to give ear to what your mother is saying.
No one can force you to marry against your will. Get to your mother with a respectable elder and let her know that she is embarrassing you with her unwarranted demands.
Assure her that in your own good time, you would get married and that you are not prepared to accept any imposition.
Obaa Yaa
He forcibly kissed me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a 20-year-old girl and a virgin. I have made up my mind not to have sex before marriage or involve myself in any immoral acts.
Interestingly, when I turned 25, I met a man who was in his early thirties doing so well with business.
He is very kind, lovely, faithful, caring, humble and God-fearing.
We began dating for some time and because he didn’t ask for sex, I concluded he was the right man for me.
One holiday, we decided to hang out. He proposed marriage to me, when I said yes, he forcibly kissed me.
Looking at things, I am afraid that he will one day forcibly have sex with me.
Should I go on with this relationship?
Annora, Sunyani.
Dear Anora,
YOU are growing and you should be able stand by the decisions you take.
Once this man has forcibly kissed you, what he intends to do next is to have sex with you.
He might be a good man so don’t end the relationship because of the incident that happened.
If you are not ready to marry, do not accept any love proposal from a man.
If you are also interested in him, kindly tell him to do the needful before any other thing.