Obaa Yaa
Will she change?
Dear Oba Yaa,
I have a child with a lady who is a teacher in one of the public institutions in Accra and we have been together for five years.
I love my girlfriend and I intend marrying her. But my worry is that I have never received a gift from her, not even on my birthday. She will remind me about a month to her own birthday so I get her a gift but when mine is due, I don’t even get a bar of chocolate.
She is always making demands but I get nothing in return. She will call me to send her as low as GH¢ 20.00 when our son needs money.
I sponsored her throughout her tertiary education until she graduated and got a job. I have plans of marrying her but judging from her current attitude, I am scared she would not be supportive when we get married. Should I go ahead, will she change?
Kobby, Adabraka.
Dear Kobby,
It seems your primary love language is receiving gifts. That is okay. But not receiving a gift from the lady you so much love is not enough grounds to call it quits. Draw her attention to the one-sided relationship when it comes to the exchange of gifts.
Discuss the essence of her lending support in the relationship and why she should not only be at the receiving end. Do not end it because you don’t receive anything on your birthday. But if your girlfriend has other negative attributes than positives which are unbearable, then you may advise yourself properly.
Obaa Yaa
My mother is stressing me.
Dear Obaa Yaa,
We have been friends for the past two years and our parents know about our relationship. Her parents have even asked me to perform the marriage customary rites.
Recently, my mother returned from the hometown and told me that she has found a girl for me to marry.
I tried to convince her that I was not interested in any girl apart from my present one, but she won’t listen.
My father, however, told me that he would support whatever decision I take.
My uncle then said that I should respect my mother’s decision and go by it.
I can’t do that because I promised to marry my girl, besides my girl has spent so much money on me when I was down financially and was not working.
Apart from that we never had any disagreement because we love each other. How do I convince my mother that she is the right girl for me.
Barima,
Bogoso
Dear Barima,
You should let your mother explain to you why she doesn’t like your current girlfriend and is ready to give you a new lady.
If your mother is currently accusing the lady of so many things try and probe further.
If you are convinced that your mother’s attitude is as a result for dislike she has for your current girl, then you must include the support of your father or a pastor.
But if you figure out that your mother is after your interest, then you and your girlfriend would need a lot of prayers. Which means the two of you, would have change your lifestyle altogether and devote yourself to prayers to get rid of whatever is going on.
It will be a great commitment but efforts will be rewarding. If you are convinced that you can handle it, then go ahead and marry your girl. Your mother will eventually come to accept her when she realises that your wife is making you happy
Obaa Yaa
Am I wicked?
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I met and befriended another girl when my girlfriend travelled out of the country. I made her to understand that my first girl was more or less my wife, so marriage would be out of the question between us, and she understood.
My girl would be returning home within a few months, and this other girl is now saying that she would rather break up with me.
She also has been sending friends to talk to me and to plead on her behalf.
The girl is again saying that I am a wicked person without feelings, and that I have used her. I know that she wants me to feel guilty, but I don’t.
Am I actually wicked like she’s saying?
Efua
Swedru,
Dear Efua,
Yes, I do believe that somehow you have treated the girl badly, and the fact that you are almost man and wife does not make you guiltless, because the end result is that you only used her to pass the time of waiting for the return of your first girl.
You can at least try and be nice to her and let her go gen tly.
But don’t make things worse by prolonging the relations
