Obaa Yaa
My mother is bitter
Dear Obaa Yaa,
My elder sister and her boyfriend want to settle down in September but there is some confusion over who will give out the marriage list. My mother thinks my father does not deserve that honour because he had abandoned us for the past 15 years.
The two-bedroom self-contained house in which we live belongs to my father. He owns other houses also which my mother has rented out. My mother is threatening to disown my sister if she involves our father in the marriage arrangements.
Our father has apologised to us and we have forgiven him but I do not know why mom is still bitter. We have tried to convince her but she will not listen to us. What do we do?
Mabel, Kasoa.
Dear Mabel,
Irrespective of whatever happened in the past, your father still has a place in the marriage ceremony. Once he is alive, he has to take the bride price and bless the marriage. However, your mother may be bitter because she might have endured a lot of challenges in the last 15 years when your father was ‘absent’.
Engage your mother once again and help her to forgive your father so they both can support the marriage ceremony. You and your siblings can as well talk to elders in your family to talk to your mother. Hopefully, things will work out because your father’s blessing is important in the marriage. But if all possible resolutions fail, respect your mother’s decision.
Obaa Yaa
I’m having second thoughts
Dear Obaa Yaa,
My man and I are planning a wedding which will take place within the next few months. It will be preceded by an engagement.
But I am beginning to have second thoughts because I suspect that my man was hiding some negative things about his character.
For instance, I visited him at his office unexpectedly, and he was exchanging profanities with another worker.
At another time, he was chasing a female worker around the office and everyone was laughing. But he is a very polite man when we are alone.
Which one do you think is his true character?
It is very important for me because I don’t want to marry a joker.
A.B, Sewhi
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Dear A.B
I don’t think you love this man at all, otherwise you will not be having second thoughts about his other side.
If you are for him, tell him how you felt on the occasions that you went to his office. Don’t make an issue out of it; let him know how much it affected you.
If he cares for you, he will do something about it.
But it might interest you to know that the behaviour of people differs when at home and at work places
Obaa Yaa
What subjects should I choose?
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I took part in General Certificate Examination, Ordinary Level (‘O’ level ), and passed in five subjects including English language 6, Modern Mathematics 5, Commerce 3, Business Management 5, and Accounting 6.
With Economics, I had 8. Due to economic constraints it would be impossible for me to attempt the economics again.
What I need from you is an advice as to which subjects I should take at the Advance level so as to go to the University.
I would also like to know the type of career I should take at the University.
A.J, Accra.
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Dear A.J
If you want to go to the Sixth form, then you would have to avoid all the subjects except the Commerce and Business Management. But since you are talking of financial constraints, you will have to look for a job and later register for part-time studies in order to take the exams.
That will not be easy but with determination, you can do it.
The career you choose finally should depend on what subjects you do best.
