Obaa Yaa
Age difference is disturbing
Obaa Yaa,
I Am 21 years old and a final year student in the university, while he is 38 doing the mandatory National Service.
We were friends for close to two years when one day, he decided to break the silence between us by leading me to the hostel after l had finished lectures.
Though he proposed to me, he was not prepared to answer certain simple questions l asked him.
With time, he became somehow cold towards me for reasons best known to him.
Having moved with him for a couple of years, l have discovered that he is down to earth, respectful, caring, and helps all manner of people in need, and to the best of my knowledge he will be the right husband for me.
Unfortunately, my friends have a different view that the age difference will not be good for both of us to stay as husband and wife.
According to them, they suspect this gentleman to be married, probably having children and could only be interested in having sex with me.
I am surprised by the views of my colleagues and currently having sleepless nights.
What should l do?
Mary- Takoradi.
Dear Mary,
Love knows no bounds and people should be allowed to marry those they really love and are prepared to spend the rest of their lives with.
However, one of the facts which should guide an individual when choosing a spouse is the difference in age.
A few years age difference will not be too much of a bother, but if the difference is about 10 years and more, then people will raise eyebrows.
Obaa Yaa
Under pressure from family to marry
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am 38 and single. In spite of the pressure I receive from my mother, I have decided not to marry now until I am financially sound.
It is this same mother of mine who would keep asking me for things even when I am married.
Obaa Yaa, recently my mother actually came to my house with a 10 member delegation from my hometown in the Ashanti Region at dawn.
Their mission was to give me two weeks ultimatum to marry or else they would bring me a wife from the village.
Obaa Yaa, please what should I do?
Akwasi.
Dear Akwasi,
MARRIAGE is not a child’s play. I understand the fact that you want to be financially sound to decide on marriage.
You are not getting younger so try to give ear to what your mother is saying.
No one can force you to marry against your will. Get to your mother with a respectable elder and let her know that she is embarrassing you with her unwarranted demands.
Assure her that in your own good time, you would get married and that you are not prepared to accept any imposition.
Obaa Yaa
He forcibly kissed me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a 20-year-old girl and a virgin. I have made up my mind not to have sex before marriage or involve myself in any immoral acts.
Interestingly, when I turned 25, I met a man who was in his early thirties doing so well with business.
He is very kind, lovely, faithful, caring, humble and God-fearing.
We began dating for some time and because he didn’t ask for sex, I concluded he was the right man for me.
One holiday, we decided to hang out. He proposed marriage to me, when I said yes, he forcibly kissed me.
Looking at things, I am afraid that he will one day forcibly have sex with me.
Should I go on with this relationship?
Annora, Sunyani.
Dear Anora,
YOU are growing and you should be able stand by the decisions you take.
Once this man has forcibly kissed you, what he intends to do next is to have sex with you.
He might be a good man so don’t end the relationship because of the incident that happened.
If you are not ready to marry, do not accept any love proposal from a man.
If you are also interested in him, kindly tell him to do the needful before any other thing.