Relationship
Blended families-tips for easing the transition-Part 2
As divorce is on the increase in numerous places in the world, blended families have become a common type of household. Many families have a lot of difficulties navigating this unique family situation with success.
A major reason is that members of blended families need to make many adjustments in their lives. The transition can be problematic. And trying to force it can breed conflict and resentment.
Last week we looked at four tips that would help ease the transition, this week we continue with another four tips.
5. Keep the biological connections strong
Encourage all the children to keep a close connection to both of their biological parents. It may be difficult when they live different cities, but it is not impossible.
When you are supportive in this way and respectful of the ex-spouses, the children will see that it is not a competition for affection. Rather, it shows them that you truly care about their happiness.
6. Give support to the children who have to live in two households
Show compassion and understanding to the children who have to move back and forth. Do not assume all is fine but be ready to listen when they need you.
They may worry about missing out on something while they are gone. They may also still have a lot of unresolved feelings about the end of their biological parent’s marriage or the death of one of their parents.
The moment of packing up and moving once again can be highly emotional and feel overwhelming to them. Be by their side.
7. Nurture your marriage
Of course, the transition is not just tough on the children but also for you and your spouse. You will need your partner’s support and they need yours. So, do not forget to make time for each other and cultivate closeness. Your relationship needs to be strong to make a success of your new blended family.
Enjoy date nights and keep your bond strong. Your children will naturally fall in place behind your lead.
8. Expect to adjust
With proper help and guidance, children can recover from family disruption. All children experience a difficult adjustment period following a divorce or remarriage.
It takes time, patience, and perhaps some professional assistance, but most children are able to regain their emotional bearings. It is critical that the adults manage their own emotional recovery in order to help the children adjust without trauma.
Source- eddinscounseling.com
Relationship
Marriage is a cultural union
Marriage is a cultural union
Marriage is often considered a cultural union; because it is a social institution that is deeply rooted in cultural norms and traditions. In many cultures, marriage is not just a union between two individuals, but a union between families, tribes, or even entire communities.
Marriage is a cultural union or institution that varies across different societies and cultures, but it typically involves certain common elements, such as a public declaration of commitment, a legal contract, and a religious or social ceremony.
In many cultures, marriage is also closely tied to religious or spiritual beliefs, and may involve elaborate ceremonies and rituals that reflect these beliefs. For example, in African and Christian dominated cultures, the wedding ceremony is usually seen as a sacred union between a man and woman, and involves a number of traditional rituals and customs that symbolise the couple’s commitment to each other and to their shared spiritual path.
The cultural significance of marriage varies widely across cultures, but some common themes include the formation of social bonds, the establishment of a family unit, and the preservation of cultural values and traditions. Marriage is often seen as a way to ensure the continuation of a particular culture or way of life, as well as a way to transmit cultural knowledge and values to future generations.
Generally, marriage can be seen as a cultural union because it is deeply embedded in the social and cultural fabric of many societies around the world. It serves as a powerful symbol of social cohesion and continuity, and reflects the values and beliefs of the communities in which it is practised.
In Christianity, marriage is often viewed as a sacred covenant between a man and a woman, established by God for the purpose of companionship, procreation, and the establishment of a family unit. While marriage is viewed as a union between two individuals, it is also seen as a union between God, the couple, and their community. The Christian view of marriage as a cultural union is rooted in the belief that human beings are created in the image of God and are therefore endowed with the capacity for love, relationship, and community.
Marriage is seen as a reflection of the triune nature of God, who exists in a perfect relationship of love and unity between Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Christian teachings emphasise the importance of fidelity, commitment, and self-sacrifice in marriage, and stress the importance of maintaining a strong and healthy relationship between spouses.
In many Christian traditions, marriage is also seen as a sacrament, a sacred rite that confers spiritual grace and blessings on the couple. The wedding ceremony is often conducted in a Church or other religious settings, and may involve rituals and customs that reflect the couple’s Christian faith and commitment to each other.
Essentially, the Christian view of marriage as a cultural union emphasizes the importance of love, commitment, and community in the establishment of a lifelong partnership between a man and a woman. It is seen as a sacred covenant between God, the couple, and their community, and serves as a powerful symbol of the values and beliefs of the Christian faith.
To be continued …
Source: Excerpts from ‘Preparing for a Happy and Fulfilling Marriage’ Book by REV. COUNSELOR PRINCE OFFEI (Psychotherapist and Marriage Therapist). https://counselorprinceass.wixsite.com/edu-counseling-psych
https://princeoffei22.wixsite. com/website-psychologist
https://princeoffei22.wixsite. com/website
COUNSELOR PRINCE & ASSOCIATES CONSULT (CPAC COUNSELLOR TRAINING INSTITUTE)
Relationship
Qualities to look out for in your marriage counsellor –Part 2
A counsellor should be able to provide strong support
Finding the right marriage counsellor can be a daunting task, but it is a crucial step in building a strong, fulfilling relationship. Last week, we discussed the importance of professional qualifications, rapport building, strong communication skills, and an impartial attitude in a marriage counsellor.
However, there are more essential qualities to consider when selecting a counsellor to guide you. In this second part, we will explore additional characteristics which make a marriage counsellor effective, supportive and trustworthy.
5. Firm ethical standards and professionalism
When it comes to matters as delicate as your relationship, among other things, ensure that your marriage counsellor adheres to a strict code of ethics and professional practice.
Ethical standards ensure that the counsellor’s actions and decisions are guided by a strong moral compass, promoting trust, respect, and fairness.
Professionalism goes hand in hand with ethical standards, as it sets the tone for a productive counselling or therapeutic relationship.
Generally, the counsellor should maintain professional boundaries including confidentiality, respecting your privacy and autonomy, and demonstrating integrity in their practice.
Confidentiality simply means that anything you discuss during your sessions will remain confidential unless there is a legal obligation or an imminent risk of harm. Knowing that your personal matters will be kept private allows you and your partner to be open and honest without fear of judgement or breach of trust.
Remember, finding a marriage counsellor with firm ethical standards and professionalism is crucial for your journey towards a happy and fulfilling marriage.
6. Problem-solving skills
Your counsellor should possess effective problem-solving skills required to help you and your partner identify the underlying issues in your relationship, and develop strategies for resolving conflicts and challenges in your relationship.
7. Empathy and compassion
Look for a counsellor who genuinely cares about your well-being and demonstrates empathy and compassion.
Empathy is the ability to put yourself in another person’s shoes and truly understand their emotions and experiences. On the other hand, compassion goes hand in hand with empathy.
Whereas empathy enables the counsellor to understand your emotions, compassion takes it a step further by prompting them to act on that understanding with kindness and care.
Compassion is the gentle hand that guides you through difficult conversations, allowing you to face the challenges in your relationship with courage and love. A compassionate marriage counsellor will provide strong support, offering a safe haven for you and your partner to express yourselves freely.
Your marriage counsellor should be able to understand and validate your emotions, providing a supportive space for you to explore your concerns. A professional marriage counsellor will try to understand your perspectives, challenges, and aspirations, ensuring that no voice goes unheard.
When choosing a marriage counsellor, remember empathy and compassion are not just nice-to-have qualities; rather they’re essential pillars that contribute to the success of your counselling journey.
8. Cultural sensitivity
Look for a counsellor who has in-depth understanding about your different cultural backgrounds, and is sensitive enough to help you through your diverse cultural beliefs, practices, relationship dynamics and challenges.
Marriage counsellors who are culturally sensitive take the time to truly understand your individual histories, backgrounds, and values, recognising that these factors shape your perspective on marriage (whether good or bad). They should honour you and your partner’s differences and work with you to find common ground, fostering an environment of inclusivity and acceptance.
To be continued …
Source: Excerpts from ‘Preparing for a Happy and Fulfilling Marriage’ Book by REV. COUNSELOR PRINCE OFFEI (Psychotherapist and Marriage Therapist). https://counselorprinceass.wixsite.com/edu-counseling-psych
https://princeoffei22.wixsite. com/website
COUNSELOR PRINCE & ASSOCIATES CONSULT (CPAC)
