Relationship
Blended families-tips for easing the transition-Part 4
As divorce is on the increase in numerous places in the world, blended families have become a common type of household. Many families have a lot of difficulties navigating this unique family situation with success.
A major reason is that members of blended families need to make many adjustments in their lives. The transition can be problematic. And trying to force it can breed conflict and resentment.
Last week we looked at four tips that would help ease the transition, this week we continue with final six tips.
13. Expect them to think it is temporary.
Accept the fact that your children may expect you and their other parent to reconcile. They may fantasise that your new relationship with your partner is only temporary. This is, especially true in the beginning. Find a time to sit down with the children and explain that when two people are unable to live together anymore, it doesn’t mean they love their children any less.
14. Expect resentment.
No matter how good a parent you are, you will never be the biological parent of your stepchildren. It is natural for a stepchild to feel some resentment for you, especially when you are setting limits for their behaviour.
15. Show the children love.
Sometimes children need love the most at a time when it is the most difficult to give it to them. While bad behavior should never be rewarded, always praise children when they are behaving well.
16. As a stepparent, be sure to take the time to bond with your new children.
Your stepchild may be resistant, but it’s important for you to lead the way and demonstrate that you are interested and care.
17. Children thrive with schedules and consistency.
The transition will be much smoother if everyone knows what’s expected of them. Have a conversation early on that outlines the expectations and ground rules.
18. Communication is vital.
Ask how you can make the children more comfortable and let them know what you need, too. Honour requests and communicate boundaries as appropriate. Most children just want to know that you’ll still be there for them. Reassure them.
Source – eddinscounseling.com