Obaa Yaa
He has set spies on me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I entered a relationship three years ago and things were moving on well and we were happy until recently when problems began to emerge.
Going by the advice of my mother not to fall prey to any man who would make fun of me and ruin my life for good, l tried to keep a distance from men until the one who was genuinely prepared to marry me.
This man has proposed to me and has assured me that he is not married and has no child, but l am afraid because l don’t know much about him and having considered his age, l think he must be hiding something under his sleeves.
He has given me the assurance that he would officially seek the consent of my parents to marry me.
However, my concern is, he has set spies on me and they are always checking every step l take and would not give me a breathing space.
They have wrongly accused me of things l have not done, thereby, giving me a bad image in the eyes of the public.
This has given me the reasonto believe that this man does not trust me and has ridiculed me.
Since the element of trust is non- existent, l would like to end the relationship.
Akos, Accra.
Dear Akos,
A lasting relationship is normally built on love, trust, tolerance and willingness to forgive the other partner.
It beats my imagination why this gentleman should set spies on you. On the contrary, it could be that this action is in reaction to an issue which might have happened in the past for which he would like to be careful in order to safeguard his interest in you.
You should let him understand how embarrassed you are about the spies he has set on you. If things continue like this while you are yet to marry, then one can imagine how the future will be if you become a couple.
Secondly, it could be that he is a jealous person who has taken the wrong step by trying to over-protect you through unfaithful friends.
Listen to your conscience and decide on the right action to take in this relationship.
Obaa Yaa
Under pressure from family to marry
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am 38 and single. In spite of the pressure I receive from my mother, I have decided not to marry now until I am financially sound.
It is this same mother of mine who would keep asking me for things even when I am married.
Obaa Yaa, recently my mother actually came to my house with a 10 member delegation from my hometown in the Ashanti Region at dawn.
Their mission was to give me two weeks ultimatum to marry or else they would bring me a wife from the village.
Obaa Yaa, please what should I do?
Akwasi.
Dear Akwasi,
MARRIAGE is not a child’s play. I understand the fact that you want to be financially sound to decide on marriage.
You are not getting younger so try to give ear to what your mother is saying.
No one can force you to marry against your will. Get to your mother with a respectable elder and let her know that she is embarrassing you with her unwarranted demands.
Assure her that in your own good time, you would get married and that you are not prepared to accept any imposition.
Obaa Yaa
He forcibly kissed me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a 20-year-old girl and a virgin. I have made up my mind not to have sex before marriage or involve myself in any immoral acts.
Interestingly, when I turned 25, I met a man who was in his early thirties doing so well with business.
He is very kind, lovely, faithful, caring, humble and God-fearing.
We began dating for some time and because he didn’t ask for sex, I concluded he was the right man for me.
One holiday, we decided to hang out. He proposed marriage to me, when I said yes, he forcibly kissed me.
Looking at things, I am afraid that he will one day forcibly have sex with me.
Should I go on with this relationship?
Annora, Sunyani.
Dear Anora,
YOU are growing and you should be able stand by the decisions you take.
Once this man has forcibly kissed you, what he intends to do next is to have sex with you.
He might be a good man so don’t end the relationship because of the incident that happened.
If you are not ready to marry, do not accept any love proposal from a man.
If you are also interested in him, kindly tell him to do the needful before any other thing.
