Obaa Yaa
I am in love with a married man
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a 27- year- old lady who has fallen in love with a married man. I met this man on a business trip in koforidua of the Eastern Region.
I fell for him at first sight, though I knew he was married because he had a ring on his finger.
He took my number and started calling to check up on me. He is super nice, caring, soft spoken and gentle.
I began to develop feelings for him because he had all the qualities I needed in a man. He proposed to me and I accepted it.
Even though I knew he was married, it didn’t stop me from dating him. We started dating and he has been very supportive and loving.
I am madly in love with him that I wish he wasn’t married, yet I do not also want to break his home. I am doing everything possible to help him hide this affair from his wife.
I am not happy dating a married man but I love him. Please what should I do?
Worried lady, Alajo.
Dear worried lady,
I an happy you said you didn’t want to break someone’s home in the first place. It is rather unfortunate you have fallen in love with a married man.
You are a very beautiful young lady and everyman will be willing to settle down with a young lady.
Try as much as possible to avoid his calls and stay away from him.
Stay away from his lane and be careful. Mind you, you are a woman and there is Karma.
Obaa Yaa
They said the carpenter is not a good match
Dear Obaa Yaa,
As a University graduate from the prestigious University of Ghana currently doing my National Service in a very great institution, I am dating a carpenter who barely completed his Junior High School.
I love him, and I don’t see any problem dating him but my sisters are against it.
I started dating him when I was in my third year, he is caring, free spirit and kind.
My sisters are saying he is not a good match for me and he will block my chances in future.
He’s even demanding to go see my parents.
Please what should I do?
Miriam,North Legon
*****
Dear Miriam,
I can see the love for your boyfriend is deep. I pray the two of you will be in this boat forever.
Love does not show class, level etc. It’s about two matured people who have decided to build a family together.
In your letter, you mentioned that your sisters were against you marrying the carpenter. They are looking at your boyfriend’s background and occupation.
If you really love him, you can help him to register for courses in order to upgrade his schooling and make his business very attractive.
I know there are men who are interested in you as well. But don’t let that get into your head. Take your time and study all of them because marriage is a long journey.
Take him to your parents as well, they might even like him.
Obaa Yaa
He has stopped going to church
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am going through hell. I have been married for five years and I have known no peace.
My husband who was a staunch Christian before we married has taken to serious drinking.
And anytime he is drunk, he insults me for no reason. We have a child together.
He has stopped going to church with us. Anytime he is drunk, he doesn’t come home.
I can’t cope any longer with the marriage, I want to quit. I need your wise counsel.
Yaa Mansa,
Techiman.
****
Dear Yaa Mansa,
Married is not a straight road. It can be rough and winding sometimes because many factors come to play.
Frustration at work can turn a man into a drunkard. Even nagging can change the nice character of a man.
Financial problems can change a man’s mood.
So humans do change, but the good thing is that they can also change for the better.
However before a person can change, the root cause of his problem must be ascertained.
Find out why your husband is drinking and also stopped going to church and help him to reform.
Note that in such circumstances, nagging does no good. He must be sympathized with and helped to turn around, and not condemned.
