I’m having second thoughts

Dear Obaa Yaa,

My man and I are planning a wedding which will take place within the next few months. It will be preceded by an engagement.

But I am beginning to have second thoughts because I suspect that my man was hiding some negative things about his character.

For instance, I visited him at his office unexpectedly, and he was exchanging profanities with another worker.

At another time, he was chasing a female worker around the office and everyone was laughing. But he is a very polite man when we are alone.

Which one do you think is his true character?

It is very important for me because I don’t want to marry a joker.

A.B, Sewhi

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Dear A.B

I don’t think you love this man at all, otherwise you will not be having second thoughts about his other side.

If you are for him, tell him how you felt on the occasions that you went to his office. Don’t make an issue out of it; let him know how much it affected you.

If he cares for you, he will do something about it.

But it might interest you to know that the behaviour of people differs when at home and at work places

What subjects should I choose?

Dear Obaa Yaa,

I took part in General Certificate Examination, Ordinary Level (‘O’ level ), and passed in five subjects including English language 6, Modern Mathematics 5, Commerce 3, Business Management 5, and Accounting 6.

With Economics, I had 8. Due to economic constraints it would be impossible for me to attempt the economics again.

What I need from you is an advice as to which subjects I should take at the Advance level so as to go to the University.

I would also like to know the type of career I should take at the University.

A.J, Accra.

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Dear A.J

If you want to go to the Sixth form, then you would have to avoid all the subjects except the Commerce and Business Management. But since you are talking of financial constraints, you will have to look for a job and later register for part-time studies in order to take the exams.

That will not be easy but with determination, you can do it.

The career you choose finally should depend on what subjects you do best.

Obaa Yaa

She used to see a mallam

Dear Obaa Yaa,

TWO years ago I went and consulted a mallam to help me get a husband. Each time, I meet a certain girl there, but we never talked, not even a simple greeting, because I did not feel comfortable to be seen at a mallam’s house.

Somehow, I started going to church and I stopped going to the mallam.

Can you imagine the shock when my elder brother recently brought this same girl home?

But what even surprised me is that the girl does not give any indication that she knows me.

I am confused because I know my brother will never forgive me if I should be the cause of trouble between them, but I don’t want him to marry someone who got him through foul means.

Please advise me on the right course to take.

T.G, Kumasi.

Dear T.G,

YOU should not be too quick in judging your brother’s girl. After all, you also went to the mallam before giving up to go to church. May be she also did the same thing, and met your brother through a natural way.

Whatever it is, the only way that you would be able to know anything at all is by talking to her, but you will have to be tactful about it.

Mind you, she does not owe you any explanations, because she could turn around to accuse you too.

What is important at this stage is to try and convince your brother’s girl, is if she still goes to the mallam, to give up just like you did. You could even invite her to your church.