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Kaka and piopio

Six strong men raped her but the 16-year-old girl pleaded with her mother not to report the matter to the police. The distressed mum will not listen to that nonsense. She dashed straight to the police station and reported the case.

The police invited the poor girl to give a statement, following which a man-hunt for the culprits would begin. The girl surprisingly started laughing at the policemen. She asked them to forget about the case.

“We want to jail the criminals,” the Inspector said, pleading with the girl to give her statement. “They won’t get anything less than ten years.”

“I enjoyed it,” she finally said curtly to the Inspector who opened his mouth in utter surprise and disbelief. Maybe he didn’t hear well.

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“What exactly did you say?”

“I said I enjoyed the game!”

The Inspector now stared at her, gaping in wonder. Was he dreaming?

“You are virtually asking us to close the case? This is a criminal offence!” he said pleadingly. “Forget about the case. After all, I enjoyed it.”

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PLEASURE

When the girl’s mother heard her daughter’s admission of pleasure instead of pain, she nearly collapsed. She couldn’t believe that her daugh­ter could say she enjoyed it when six men took turns to ravage and tear her apart. There might be something wrong with her.

In the Inspector’s fifteen-year ex­perience in the service, he had never encountered a case as intriguing as this. Well, if the girl said she enjoyed the three-hour session, then techni­cally the case was closed. Whoever charged someone in court for giving pleasure to another? If there should be anything at all, the rapists should be congratulated on a good job done. Docket closed!

But the docket did not close on the girl’s sexual adventures and misadven­tures. She was asked to go and live with her auntie and her husband. It was there that she proved she en­joyed the gang-rape. And if she did, then her auntie’s husband was in big trouble.

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This girl tempted the 45-year-old man in so many ways until he fell from grace. His wife caught him too doing something to the girl in the bath­room. She was not exactly a witness to what took place when the shower was on for 45 minutes. But the fact that it was her loving husband who was enjoying the shower with her niece offered a vivid imagery of what transpired.

It did not need anyone to do a video coverage of the bathroom event to find the two guilty of taboo. But before anybody could offer rituals to cleanse them, the girl now 18 disap­peared and reappeared in Accra. She promptly got married to a prosperous young businessman.

The man was visibly excited. The girl was fair-coloured, sexy and beau­tiful and he thought he was blessed with such a dazzling Madonna.

“This is God-sent,” he openly ad­mitted to his friends.

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Two months later, he came back home to find his loving wife frantically sucking the huge phallus of his close friend. The sight nearly made him develop stroke. The friend started pleading for forgiveness.

“She begged me to have sex with her,” he said.

The marriage ended and the girl was distraught. She loved the man but something within her would just not keep her from seeking pleasure extra-time. Oh! What exactly was wrong.

CATECHIST

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She ended up in a charismat­ic church. She realised she needed deliverance and sought divine help. “I’m suffering from kakapiopio!” she told the resident pastor. He had never heard of such a disease and asked the catechist to find out exactly what was happening to the young woman.

Before the catechist could diag­nose the disease, the girl stripped him of his clothes and stooped before him. Her buttocks were presented full-plate and the man of God could not resist the temptation. The quality of the girl’s body required that the Bible be put aside for a while. Later on, he could sort out matters with God.

The girl nearly tore the church apart because she also put the choir-master to the test and nearly brought down a few deacons. She now headed for the pastor himself. | If it had not been for God’s intervention, this girl would have made the pastor crawl on all fours legs like Nebuchad­nezzar.

After leaving the church in dis­grace, the girl (now woman) got married and delivered two children in quick succession, She decided to set­tle down to family life. The husband, fat plumpy man soon began to slim down. It was not as a result of HIV/ AIDS. The woman just would not allow him to sleep.

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SHOWDOWN

He was forced to fulfil his marital obligations before sleeping, again around midnight and finally and most auspiciously at dawn. The dawn show­down was normally quite hectic and by morning the man was virtually a wreck, a раthetic shadow of himself.

After four-years on the sex job, the man decided to proceed on pension. He could not perform his nightly duties without collapsing. And his wife would not stop forcing him to go and go. She was insatiable.

All his energy was sapped; divorce was the only option if he was to save his life. Moreover, he had heard from the grapevine that the woman was also servicing a good number of peo­ple in the neighbourhood.

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What was most annoying was that she was doing so for free. At least if she were bringing some money home, her misconduct would have been justified on financial grounds. He quit the marriage.

A few years after that, this sex-machine of a lady got down with a deadly disease.’ That was when she told her story, still not knowing that she was afflicted with a disease called “nymphomania”. It is a psychological condition. Nymphomania is the un­controllable desire to have sex. If you have it see Dr. Asare!

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The Prophet part 4

Antobam woke up with a terri­ble headache. He checked the time on his mobile phone, 2:30 am. “What! Where is the money?” He asked aloud. “Where are those girls? Why did I drink so much of that whisky? What were those two girls up to?” He sat up on the bed and noticed a bulge close to the pillow.

He lifted the mattress and picked up the newspaper wrappers with the neatly arranged notes. He saw the neatly written record of the value of the notes. No, those girls are not thieves.

“It was my mistake. If I hadn’t drank myself to sleep they would be here in bed with me, giving me the time of my life. Pretty girls, those two. And so loyal and honest. Tomorrow will be different.”

“I will not drink any whisky, and I will show them that I am a real man. Just then he heard the whis­pers. Very soon it will be time, they seemed to be saying. This is an important day.”

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The gold dealer will bring lots of money. Give him some of the liquid to drink, and we will prepare him. He will do very big business, and he will give you anything you ask for. There will be more miracles and testimonies today.

Antobam smiled to himself. “I am going to be a very rich man in only a few days man. Money, power, and women. Wow! Antobam got to the grounds at 5, but there were quite a number of people waiting.

Mr Kwame Dofu was among them. He greeted them all, and they came around to shake his hand. “My brothers and sisters, I assure you that whatever your problem is, you will not go home without a solu­tion.” Shouts of “Amen” “thank” you Osofo and “you are a true man of God” responded.

“Please take your seats, and start talking to the great one about what­ever bothers you. Before the service is over, there will be a solution.” He waved Mr Dofu over, and went with him to the wooden structure that serves as a temporary office.

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“My brother, I have done quite a lot of work on the issue you came to see me about. I have prepared a special, powerful package for you. Take this, drink it, and go back to your business. I want to see you in two weeks.”

Beaming with smiles, Mr Dofu drank the foul smelling liquid in two gulps, said a big thank you to Anto­bam and took his leave. “I believe you, Papa Osofo. And I assure you that I will reward you, big time.”

Just when Osofo Antubam finished with Mr Dofu, Mary and Suzzie went over to him. “Good Morning ladies. I am very sorry about yesterday. I drank too much of the stuff you gave me. Today will be different, I assure you.”

“Don’t worry, Osofo. Since you are now setting things up, our main concern now is to help you to put things in place, and to make you comfortable. We are always there to serve you. This morning, Osofo, we want to go and clean up your place, and prepare something nice for you when you close.

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And before coming to church, we will pass by the bank and collect the forms. After you have signed them, the account will be open. You can check the payments anytime and, of course, issue cheques whenever you need money.”

“Suzzie and Mary, I am happy I picked the two of you from the very start. Listen, I will take good care of you, okay? Here is some money. Buy whatever you need for the er­rands you have mentioned.

And here is the key. Please come back as early as you can. You know I need you here.” The service was very lively. The lively singing of praise songs was followed by one and a half hours of testimonies.

Most of them related to money – big sales, new jobs and overdue debts paid. But there were also testimonies about healing. Barren women had taken seed, and, of course, several men who had lost their bedroom authority had re­gained them, to the delight of their partners.

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As he had promised, Antobam preached for only 30 minutes, ex­horting the congregation to attend church regularly, pay their tithes and offerings, and strictly follow his ‘directions’ for securing solutions to their problems.

After another round of prais­es during which the congregation danced to the floor to drop their offering, he closed the service, grabbed the big bowl which was full to the brim with money, and moved to his desk. A long queue was quick­ly formed at the desk.

Meanwhile, Mary and Suzzie had gone to give Antobam’s place quite a decent look. A new bedsheet and pillows, a secondhand carpet and four plastic chairs placed in the verandah had done the trick.

They also prepared two fish and chicken stews. After all these, they rushed to the National Savings Bank and collected application forms for opening current and savings ac­counts.

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They joined the service a few minutes before the main session closed. Antobam looked round and saw, to his relief, Mary and Suzzie moving towards him. “Hello ladies. What have you been up to?” “Quite a bit, Osofo. We’ve just collected your drink. Here you are. We’ve made a few changes at your place. I think you will like it. You will also have something nice to eat. Now, here are the forms for the savings and current accounts.

If you will sign them, the bank will open the account. From today, we can pay all monies direct into the account.” ‘How can I thank you, ladies?” “You don’t need to thank us,” Suzzie said. “It is our duty to help a man of God succeed.” “Okay, my ladies, please take the offerings and count them as you did yester­day.

You can add the payments made after the consultations. Will it be possible to pay them into the account today?” “Yes,” Mary said. “The bank closes at four. If we leave here at three, we would be there just in time.”

The two friends started counting, as Osofo Antobam gave his clients his directions for solving their prob­lems. On quite a few occasions he closed his eyes as if he was receiv­ing direction from above on what to do.

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But as the fetish priest at the Nana Kofi Broni shrine and the dwarfs had assured him, the solu­tions would certainly be provided. Having heard the huge testimonies earlier in the day, the clients parted with substantial sums of money in expectation.

By Ekow de Heer

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The issue of spiritual father in our churches

 A student was supposed to go to school as the natural cause of events should be when universities or schools in general opens but this was not the case in a certain young man’s life.

He decided to postpone his trip because apparently he could not get to meet his pastor, his spiritual father. The question is, should this spiritual father die, will the young man’s life come to an end?

Does it mean in such an instance, he is going to curtail his education? This is a wor­rying trend in a lot of church­es where the pastors use this notion of spiritual father to manipulate members espe­cially the youth.

Some unscrupulous pastors utilise this spiritual father concept to have affairs with gullible young ladies in their churches.

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Now with homosexuality gradually making inroads into some of the churches, young men are becoming vulnerable to pastors who have hidden homosexual inclinations.

This spiritual father con­cept is a Biblical concept that runs through both the Old Testament as well as the New Testament. We see it in 2 Kings 4:12 where Gehazi is serving Elisha and also in the New Testament we see Paul relating to Timothy in 1 Timo­thy 1:2 as a Spiritual Father.

In fact, the concept of spiritual father is a good thing if executed according to the word of God since it helps in guiding the younger ones. However, it becomes prob­lematic when it is being exe­cuted by unscrupulous wolves in sheepskins as described by Jesus in Mathew 7:15.

I see it as a way that these unscrupulous so-called men of God maintain their hold on the congregants so they do not question their unchristian actions.

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One of the things I have observed since I got born again many years ago is that, any pastor who often insists that members recognise that he is their spiritual father is a warning sign that he is doing some wrong things or is about to indulge in some wrong things.

A parent complained about how his daughter was being influenced by a pastor of the church she attends and how worried he was. I am sure there are many parents out there with stories to tell about how their wards are be­ing made to see their pastors almost like their Jesus.

These pastors have man­aged to make their congre­gants so loyal to them and to believe in them so much that it is terrifying, as a parent.

The way things are going, an immediate intervention is required otherwise I am not a prophet of doom but I forsee unfortunate instances where parents burst into church auditoriums and star shooting some Pastors out of frustra­tion and anger.

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We cannot look on uncon­cerned as a society and allow unscrupulous fraudsters using the name of God to create problems for families. My recommendation is for a cer­tain amount of regulation in order to bring some sanity in religious practices.

I agree that ordinarily regulating religious practices makes it a bit restrictive in terms of freedom of worship as enshrined in our constitu­tion but given the way things are going, a bit of regulation will not be out of place.

Disgusting stuff are being attributed to some men of God. There are cases of ma­nipulation of young ladies and sometimes married women by so called men of God and it is bringing Christianity and therefore the name of the Lord into disrepute.

Christianity is gradually losing its attractiveness as a result of the negative report­age resulting from disgusting stuff happening in Christian circles. The way some pas­tors have been manipulating congregants to take money from them leaves much to be desired to the point where they are convincing some of the youth to give out their phones. May God help us.

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By Laud Kissi-Mensah 

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