Features
Laughter heals
It is said that laughter is medicine and therefore by implication, has a healing power. It is a generally held view that for those who live long, one of the characteristics associated with them is frequent laughter.
It is widely believed that one of the ways to reduce stress is laughter. At a personal level, I have observed that after watching drama movies and having laughed a lot due to the numerous funny scenes, I feel very relaxed afterwards.
Looking at the obituaries in the media space and on walls at various places across the country, the average age of deceased people, falls within the youthful bracket. Given the current economic conditions, stressful conditions can negatively impact lives which in extreme situations may result in unfortunate incidents like suicide.
It is in this light that this piece is being written to enable people, especially members of the Ghanaian public, laugh off the stress some of them might be going through.
The story is told of a Catholic Priest whose congregation go to for confession as the usual practice of the church is. When they go to him, the usual refrain is “Father, I committed adultery” or “Father, I committed fornication.” The confession of adultery and fornication and the gory details were becoming too much to bear for the Father, who although has sworn to a life of celibacy was human after all.
The father therefore, issued a directive to the church to just say “Father, I fell” when the members come to confess and they have committed either adultery or fornication and he would understand what they actually meant and he in turn would encourage them to go and sin no more. This was the practice that was then established in the Parish and it made things easier for congregants and the Father, the priest.
This father was transferred and a new father was brought in who did not know the convention that had been established between the previous father and the congregants. The new priest started hearing “Father, I fell”, “Father, I fell” from a lot of the congregants during confessions. He was alarmed by the falls which he attributed to the uneven surfaces of the sidewalks in the city. He therefore decided to go and complain to the Mayor of the city. He went to him and said “Mayor, you really need to do something about the pavements in this city because all I hear at confession is “Father, I fell” all the time.
The Mayor who was also a congregant started laughing uncontrollably. The father became annoyed at the behaviour of the mayor who he assumed was not taking his complaint seriously enough and said “why are you laughing, this is serious. Only last week your wife fell three times”. Immediately, the mayor’s laughter stopped abruptly and he collapsed.
A story was told of how a man’s infidelity created a problem for him. This man left his phone while watching TV with his wife for a moment to go to the washroom. An incoming message alert caused the wife to pick up the phone and saw a message from his side chick urgently requesting for GH¢2,000.
His wife quickly deleted the message and using her new number sent the same message to her husband. The man on seeing the message went to request the money from her wife with the excuse that his mum was not well. She willingly gave him the money and he in turn transferred the money to his ‘side chick’.
Next morning he called his side chick’s new number to confirm receipt of the money sent and guess the voice that responded “Yes, I have received it”, his own wife’s voice. The man is still wandering in town figuring out how he is going to go to his own house to meet his wife.
By Laud Kissi-Mensah
Features
Preventing the brain’s melting point with BOS
The human brain is a complex and delicate organ, susceptible to damage from various factors, including extreme temperatures.
The brain’s melting point, also known as the temperature threshold beyond which brain tissue begins to degrade, is a critical concern for individuals seeking to maintain optimal cognitive function.
Fortunately, the Brain Operating System (BOS) offers a revolutionary solution to prevent the brain’s melting point.
Understanding the brain’s melting point
The brain’s melting point refers to the temperature threshold beyond which brain tissue begins to degrade, leading to irreversible damage.
This temperature threshold varies depending on individual factors, such as age, health, and environmental conditions. However, research suggests that the brain’s melting point is approximately 104°F (40°C) to 107°F (42°C).
The role of BOS in preventing the brain’s melting point
BOS, a cutting-edge technology, plays a crucial role in preventing the brain’s melting point. By leveraging advanced neural interfaces and artificial intelligence, BOS monitors and regulates brain temperature, ensuring that it remains within a safe range.
How BOS prevents the brain’s melting point
BOS prevents the brain’s melting point through several mechanisms:
1. Temperature regulation: BOS continuously monitors brain temperature, adjusting neural activity to maintain a stable temperature.
2. Heat dissipation: BOS enhances heat dissipation through increased blood flow and sweating.
3. Neuro protection: BOS protects neurons from heat-induced damage.
Benefits of BOS in preventing the brain’s melting point
The benefits of BOS in preventing the brain’s melting point are numerous:
1. Prevents brain damage: BOS prevents brain damage caused by excessive heat.
2. Maintains cognitive function: BOS ensures optimal cognitive function by maintaining stable brain temperature.
3. Enhances brain resilience: BOS enhances brain resilience to temperature fluctuations.
Real-World applications of BOS
BOS has various real-world applications:
1. High-performance computing: BOS enables high-performance computing by maintaining optimal brain temperature.
2. Medical applications: BOS has medical applications, such as treating heat-related illnesses.
3. Space exploration: BOS is crucial for space exploration, where extreme temperatures pose a significant risk.
Conclusion
BOS is a revolutionary technology that prevents the brain’s melting point, ensuring optimal cognitive function and overall well-being. By leveraging advanced neural interfaces and artificial intelligence, BOS monitors and regulates brain temperature, protecting against heat-related damage.
Glossary:
1. BOS: Brain Operating System.
2. Brain’s melting point: Temperature threshold beyond which brain tissue begins to degrade.
3. Neural interface: Connects human brain with digital devices.
Contact Information
virginvtech@yahoo.com
Additional resources:
1. BOS research: Explore scientific studies.
2. Neural interface resources: Discover books and articles.
3. Brain-computer interface communities: Join online forums.
Future directions
As BOS technology continues to evolve, we can expect:
1. Improved temperature regulation: Enhanced temperature regulation mechanisms.
2. Increased cognitive enhancement: Advanced cognitive enhancement capabilities.
3. Expanded applications: New applications in various fields.
By harnessing the power of BOS, individuals can safeguard their brain health and maintain optimal cognitive function, even in extreme environments.
By Robert Ekow Grimmond-Thompson
Features
Lotto wahala and Tuobodom palaver
In Sikaman lotto is not a game. It is a profession, a noble career which people aspire to. It is the highest paying profession after armed robbery and the most widespread job on this side of the Atlantic.
In places like China, lotto is a disease that has no cure. Once you are infected, no doctor on earth can cure you. May be Kofi Larteh, Ghana’s most celebrated magician, can help ease the symptoms, but no definitive cure will be forthcoming.
Coming back to Sikaman, lotto has been the financial messiah of many. That is how people look after their large families, pay school fees, marry two wives and do their own ‘monkey things.’
If you are very poor and you win a lottery, chances are that you will die before you even collect the money. You’ll die out of excitement or you’ll start day-dreaming in the streets and an articulated truck will hit you.
As such, very heavy wins are not recommended for poor people, lest they get listed too soon in the obituary columns.
The sad story is told of a heavy-duty caterpillar driver who had a very heavy lotto windfall of several millions, his first big win after several years.
CATERPILLAR
He was driving the caterpillar home when he saw his son running towards him, shouting. “All your numbers have dropped! All your numbers have dropped! He could not believe his ears.
All the four numbers he had staked had dropped and his son, who had gone to stake them for him, was himself over-excited. The poor caterpillar man just could not handle the good news. He suddenly stepped on the brakes and the caterpillar jolted him a trifle too violently, throwing him off. He landed right in front of the still moving heavy-duty machine and it crushed him flat.
I don’t think the bloke would have died if he had won a smaller amount. Sometimes too much cash is not good for the health.
Seldom, people get too confident and that can also result in a wake-keeping, like that of a man who used his lifetime savings and borrowed extra money to crack the machine with a two-sure that the compiler must compulsory drop or the world will end.
Even the shadows of the numbers or their counterparts were nowhere near the winning numbers. His shock-absorbers crumbled under the weight of the heavy disappointment. He crashed to the floor and started foaming at the mouth. He was declared dead on arrival at the nearest clinic.
WINDFALL
Recently, there was a countrywide lotto windfall, and in Kumasi it was more than a festival. Most stakers had between ¢30m and ¢40 million on two-sure that the lotto magicians had predicted at least three weeks earlier,
Kejetia chop bars were besieged with overnight millionaires, carrying huge appetites induced by Opeimu Bitters popularly called Opeimu Peters. All the meat and mudfish got sold out within an hour and procurement agents had to double up to restock.
While some were celebrating, others were weeping and gnashing teeth. The problem was that, three weeks beforehand, the two sure numbers were declared by all the lotto sorcerers, dreamers, magicians, tellers and all the self-appointed and self-promoted forecasters.
Everybody including 10-year-olds, who staked and lost. The following week, they were advised to continue staking. The faithful did continue but the faithless stopped. All of them lost. In the third week or so, a good number of confident stakers had lost faith in the two numbers. That was when the number landed.
So the windfall was for only those who had the unshakeable faith in the numbers. See what faith can do? It can move dollars. Don’t waver, so saith the holy scriptures.
The faithless indeed gnashed teeth. The winners on the other hand celebrated with a song that is as controversial as the business of lotto. It is a song played by the group called Nkasei and has something to do with a town in the Brong Ahafo Region called Tuobodom whose capital we hear is Jinijini.
I hear it is a derogatory song and the queen mother of Tuobodom got charged and breathed out electric current during her protest on air. She allegedly ended up demanding a mobile phone from Nkasei so that she could communicate with them to settle the matter peacefully, lest wahala.
Well, the song is rising up the charts and Nkasei are making the dough, but should it be at the expense of a whole townsfolk, their forebears and generations to come?
WATERPROOF
Waterproof, the famous comedian, was allegedly given hefty slaps at the Kumasi rail station by some Frafra jingoists who felt he was deriding their tribe. And Bob Okala had to run with his tail between his legs when he was confronted and realised that slaps were going to be visited on his lean face.
Let’s not use words and lyrics to cause discomfort to others.
This article was first published on Saturday July 9, 2005
