Obaa Yaa
She has changed her attitude
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I have been married to my wife for several years and we have had a fairly good marriage.
She started work last year after five years of being a housewife, and her attitude towards me has changed. She no longer wait on me the way she used to and lately she gets annoyed easily.
Our home is no longer a happy place even though we eat better than before. I am tempted to let her stop the work, but she will not even compromise on that.
How can I make her to see what she is doing to me?
C. C, Accra.
Dear C. C,
JUST what is your wife doing to you? I do believe that if there is any compromising to be done, it should come from you. If you are no longer shouldering all the financial burden, you should show some appreciation by helping with house chores. And doing things for yourself is one way of helping.
And come to think of it, marriage is supposed to be sharing and not one partner waiting on the other; except perhaps when that partner is sick.
If you want happiness and peace of mind, treat her like a partner and discuss all your problems. Any decision that you take should be mutual, otherwise one of you will always be dissatisfied.
• Kwabena kwabena in
Obaa Yaa
They get on my nerves
Dear Obaa Yaa,
Both my wife and I are middle school leavers, but because her brothers are overseas, she goes abroad regularly. Because of that she has joined a certain class of people who believe that my wife is better educated than I am and therefore, look down on me.
The way she sometimes communicates with me is so annoying and makes me feel sad.
I overheard one of them asking my wife how she could marry an illiterate like me, and surprisingly she laughed at it as if it was a huge joke. When I confronted my wife afterwards, she denied everything.
I don’t want to divorce my wife, but her friends get on my nerves.
Please advise me.
Kwaku Teye, Konogo
Dear Kwaku Teye,
The current state of your wife is making her feel she is better than you. I can imagine how you feel. It is not fair for your wife to encourage her friends to make derogatory remarks about you.
However, do not make an issue out of it, especially as your wife has denied it.
I will advise you to talk to your wife to stay away from her friends if she really needs her marriage.
I will also plead with you to further your education if you have the means and resources.
Obaa Yaa
My friend has taken over my girl friend
Dear Obaa Yaa,
Sometime ago, I met a pretty girl, but I was too shy to approach her, so I asked a friend to talk to her on my behalf.
My friend came back and told me that after talking to the girl, he learned that she was no good so I should forget about her.
My friend, who is a born again, is always in the girl’s company. When I tackled him about it the first time, he told me that he was trying to get her to change.
They are almost inseparable now and my friend has been avoiding me. I want to confront him in the presence of the girl and embarrass him.
Will I be justified in my action?
Opoku Oware, Accra.
Dear Opoku Oware,
I WOULD not resort to any confrontations if I were you; it will only make you more miserable.
Admittedly, your friend did not behave well because in a way, he has betrayed you.
But don’t forget that he was under no obligation to chat up the girl for you, so don’t blame him.
The next time you see a girl that you fancy, just teem up confidence and boldness and walk up to her.
