Obaa Yaa
Should l marry his friend?
Dear Obaa Yaa,
We have been married for two years and were happy from the beginning.
At that time, my happiness was the utmost desire of my husband but suddenly he began to disassociate himself from anything that concerns my happiness.
I am a pharmacist and my husband works at a reputable company.
Though my husband is very supportive and hardworking, his current behaviour has started to affect me greatly, and I am beginning to lose interest in him.
I met this new friend who has shown interest in me and does everything possible to make sure that I am always happy.
I am beginning to develop feelings and affections for him, and even considering to marry him so that I can achieve my happiness.
Should I go ahead and marry him or I should wait for my husband with the hope that he will change?
Roberta, Accra
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Dear Roberta,
There is no situation that is permanent in this world so you must be prepared to accept the fact that people can change over time.
Since your husband was very supportive, loving and caring from the beginning but has suddenly changed, you must be sincere to yourself and find out whether your behaviour has caused him to change.
Though your friend has been good to you and ensured that you are happy, that should not lead to marriage.
So far as you are still married to your husband, you will compound your problem if you go ahead and marry this gentleman.
First of all, it will destroy the relationship between the three of you.
What is the guarantee that the love this gentleman is expressing will last? Have you forgotten how your husband loved you at the beginning of your relationship?
Do not take any hasty decision because you can’t tell what will happen in future.
Your husband could change while this gentleman could be a pretender, an opportunist or something else.
A pretender will exhibit his true character when he gets what he is looking for.
Kindly hold onto what you have, no matter how bad it may look.
Obaa Yaa
Under pressure from family to marry
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am 38 and single. In spite of the pressure I receive from my mother, I have decided not to marry now until I am financially sound.
It is this same mother of mine who would keep asking me for things even when I am married.
Obaa Yaa, recently my mother actually came to my house with a 10 member delegation from my hometown in the Ashanti Region at dawn.
Their mission was to give me two weeks ultimatum to marry or else they would bring me a wife from the village.
Obaa Yaa, please what should I do?
Akwasi.
Dear Akwasi,
MARRIAGE is not a child’s play. I understand the fact that you want to be financially sound to decide on marriage.
You are not getting younger so try to give ear to what your mother is saying.
No one can force you to marry against your will. Get to your mother with a respectable elder and let her know that she is embarrassing you with her unwarranted demands.
Assure her that in your own good time, you would get married and that you are not prepared to accept any imposition.
Obaa Yaa
He forcibly kissed me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a 20-year-old girl and a virgin. I have made up my mind not to have sex before marriage or involve myself in any immoral acts.
Interestingly, when I turned 25, I met a man who was in his early thirties doing so well with business.
He is very kind, lovely, faithful, caring, humble and God-fearing.
We began dating for some time and because he didn’t ask for sex, I concluded he was the right man for me.
One holiday, we decided to hang out. He proposed marriage to me, when I said yes, he forcibly kissed me.
Looking at things, I am afraid that he will one day forcibly have sex with me.
Should I go on with this relationship?
Annora, Sunyani.
Dear Anora,
YOU are growing and you should be able stand by the decisions you take.
Once this man has forcibly kissed you, what he intends to do next is to have sex with you.
He might be a good man so don’t end the relationship because of the incident that happened.
If you are not ready to marry, do not accept any love proposal from a man.
If you are also interested in him, kindly tell him to do the needful before any other thing.
