Features
The funny side of Ghanaian politics
A couple of weeks ago, I went to collect something from my sister at her home because I left it there when I visited the previous day for a family event. When I got there, my niece who is about five years old was in the yard, so I called out to her through the gaps in the metallic gate and asked her to go and call her mother to come and open the main gate for me, to enter with my vehicle.
Her mother came out and she said, “The man you referred to as ‘Papa No’ is your uncle.” Apparently, she went to her mom and told her that, the man who came here yesterday, is at the gate asking you to come and open the gate for him. Now when you mention ‘Papa No’, it becomes a sensitive word and someone who is politically inclined will either laugh or become offended depending on which party the person belongs.
According to news reportage, the term became an issue as a result of banter between some ladies on social media who were apparently fighting over a sugar daddy. Another lady who was a friend to one of the quarrelling ladies, referred to him as ‘Papa No’.
It was further brought into the public arena and became a topical issue when a popular Ghanaian musician called Sidney, came out with a song entitled ‘Papa No’. Since then, ‘Papa No’ has been trending on social media and has generated a lot of buzz all across the country. The funny thing is that no one has categorically mentioned the name of the person being referred to as ‘Papa No’, who it is believed to be a big shot in Ghanaian politics.
A funny incident recently occurred in parliament, to be specific, last week Friday, when parliament was debating a bill for approval or otherwise, concerning the financial vehicle known as the Agyapa Mineral Royalty Bill to deal with royalties from our mineral sector, to raise urgently needed funds for government. During the debate, the MP for Yapei–Kusawgu, John Jinapor, was against the approval of the bill and forcefully gave his opinion in support of his position.
Immediately afterwards, the current Minister for Information who is also the MP for Ofoase- Ayirebi Constituency, Kwadwo Oppong Nkrumah was given the floor. He eloquently enumerated why the bill must be approved. He then ended his submission by saying that “if the man who just spoke who is a good friend of mine, and Mr Speaker in my hometown we say ‘Papa No’ ‘Papa No’ …”, suddenly all hell broke loose.
There was uproar of laughter on the Majority side amid shouts of ‘Papa No’ and indignation on the side of the minority. The Public Accounts Committee (PAC) Chairman got up to implore the Speaker of Parliament to ask the Minister of Information to withdraw that reference of ‘Papa No’ and when the Speaker appeared not to be paying attention to him, the Minority Leader then got up.
He complained to the Speaker to ask Mr Oppong Nkrumah to withdraw that reference of ‘Papa No’. He went on to further state that if Mr Oppong Nkrumah refuses to withdraw, then the Minority would also refuse to recognise him as the Minister for Information and would also call him ‘Maame No’.
The Majority Leader also got up and said that the Minister was just cracking a joke and should not be taken as an insult or an attempt to demean his colleague MP. He then went on to say that if the Minority Leader is insistent, then the Minority Leader must be made to also retract the ‘Maame No’ reference. Then some drama ensued as the Chairman of PAC who was sitting not more than a metre away from the Minority Leader said that the Minority Leader did not say ‘Maame No’ to which the Majority leader replied “You see how it is?” and added, “If you say you did not hear your leader say ‘Maame No’, then it is very strange.” Finally, the Speaker ruled that these happenings were not new in parliament and that all sides should ignore the comments and move on.
During the period leading to the 2016 elections, a term appeared in the political space which was a reference of one of the then presidents to one of the chairmen of the opposition parties. The term ‘Opana’, became a topical issue and the usual political jabs were being thrown back and forth across the radio waves and social media. Ordinary folks started using the term to crack jokes and during phone-in sessions on radio, serial callers had a field day with the word.
Recently, the name ‘Government Official One’ has also become a topical issue. The NDC mounted a spirited defence when the NPP communicators were suggesting that the ‘Government Official One’ was a reference to former President Mahama. In fact, a press conference was organised to debunk the allegation that the ‘Government Official One’ was not former President Mahama as some people sought to suggest. Up till now, the former president has not debunked the allegations that he is the person being referred to as ‘Government Official One’ in the Airbus case.
‘Domestication’ was a term that became a word on the lips of everyone many years ago, due to its use by the late Mr Dan Lartey who was then an independent presidential candidate in 2008 elections. He became known as Mr Domestication and was all over the airwaves. He was quite a character and a jovial one at that which endeared him to the hearts of many Ghanaians until his passing. He was quite happy that people were calling him Mr Domestication and it did not bother him at all. Just like what we experienced at school, the more you react violently to a nickname, the more it encourages colleagues to call you by that name.
‘Papa No’ has become a hot item due to the attempt by people who are supporters of former President Mahama and who seek to defend him by saying that he is not the person the lady referred to as ‘Papa No’. Till they realise that this is not going away until they stop pushing back, the ‘Papa No’ will continue to be the topic for discussion for a very long time. It also has a nice ring to it and so people are prone to creating fun with it.
The funny thing also is that, it is a word that is often used in the Twi language, and so its use has caught on with a lot of people. Now one needs to be careful in the use of ‘Papa No’ otherwise you can easily be classified as an opponent of NDC due to the highly polarised political environment currently existing in the country, and more so as we approach the elections.
Given the sense of humour of Ghanaians, we have not seen or heard the end of such terms and name calling, and the earlier we got used to it the better.
AVERAGE CITIZEN
Features
The Prophet part 4
Antobam woke up with a terrible headache. He checked the time on his mobile phone, 2:30 am. “What! Where is the money?” He asked aloud. “Where are those girls? Why did I drink so much of that whisky? What were those two girls up to?” He sat up on the bed and noticed a bulge close to the pillow.
He lifted the mattress and picked up the newspaper wrappers with the neatly arranged notes. He saw the neatly written record of the value of the notes. No, those girls are not thieves.
“It was my mistake. If I hadn’t drank myself to sleep they would be here in bed with me, giving me the time of my life. Pretty girls, those two. And so loyal and honest. Tomorrow will be different.”
“I will not drink any whisky, and I will show them that I am a real man. Just then he heard the whispers. Very soon it will be time, they seemed to be saying. This is an important day.”
The gold dealer will bring lots of money. Give him some of the liquid to drink, and we will prepare him. He will do very big business, and he will give you anything you ask for. There will be more miracles and testimonies today.
Antobam smiled to himself. “I am going to be a very rich man in only a few days man. Money, power, and women. Wow! Antobam got to the grounds at 5, but there were quite a number of people waiting.
Mr Kwame Dofu was among them. He greeted them all, and they came around to shake his hand. “My brothers and sisters, I assure you that whatever your problem is, you will not go home without a solution.” Shouts of “Amen” “thank” you Osofo and “you are a true man of God” responded.
“Please take your seats, and start talking to the great one about whatever bothers you. Before the service is over, there will be a solution.” He waved Mr Dofu over, and went with him to the wooden structure that serves as a temporary office.
“My brother, I have done quite a lot of work on the issue you came to see me about. I have prepared a special, powerful package for you. Take this, drink it, and go back to your business. I want to see you in two weeks.”
Beaming with smiles, Mr Dofu drank the foul smelling liquid in two gulps, said a big thank you to Antobam and took his leave. “I believe you, Papa Osofo. And I assure you that I will reward you, big time.”
Just when Osofo Antubam finished with Mr Dofu, Mary and Suzzie went over to him. “Good Morning ladies. I am very sorry about yesterday. I drank too much of the stuff you gave me. Today will be different, I assure you.”
“Don’t worry, Osofo. Since you are now setting things up, our main concern now is to help you to put things in place, and to make you comfortable. We are always there to serve you. This morning, Osofo, we want to go and clean up your place, and prepare something nice for you when you close.
And before coming to church, we will pass by the bank and collect the forms. After you have signed them, the account will be open. You can check the payments anytime and, of course, issue cheques whenever you need money.”
“Suzzie and Mary, I am happy I picked the two of you from the very start. Listen, I will take good care of you, okay? Here is some money. Buy whatever you need for the errands you have mentioned.
And here is the key. Please come back as early as you can. You know I need you here.” The service was very lively. The lively singing of praise songs was followed by one and a half hours of testimonies.
Most of them related to money – big sales, new jobs and overdue debts paid. But there were also testimonies about healing. Barren women had taken seed, and, of course, several men who had lost their bedroom authority had regained them, to the delight of their partners.
As he had promised, Antobam preached for only 30 minutes, exhorting the congregation to attend church regularly, pay their tithes and offerings, and strictly follow his ‘directions’ for securing solutions to their problems.
After another round of praises during which the congregation danced to the floor to drop their offering, he closed the service, grabbed the big bowl which was full to the brim with money, and moved to his desk. A long queue was quickly formed at the desk.
Meanwhile, Mary and Suzzie had gone to give Antobam’s place quite a decent look. A new bedsheet and pillows, a secondhand carpet and four plastic chairs placed in the verandah had done the trick.
They also prepared two fish and chicken stews. After all these, they rushed to the National Savings Bank and collected application forms for opening current and savings accounts.
They joined the service a few minutes before the main session closed. Antobam looked round and saw, to his relief, Mary and Suzzie moving towards him. “Hello ladies. What have you been up to?” “Quite a bit, Osofo. We’ve just collected your drink. Here you are. We’ve made a few changes at your place. I think you will like it. You will also have something nice to eat. Now, here are the forms for the savings and current accounts.
If you will sign them, the bank will open the account. From today, we can pay all monies direct into the account.” ‘How can I thank you, ladies?” “You don’t need to thank us,” Suzzie said. “It is our duty to help a man of God succeed.” “Okay, my ladies, please take the offerings and count them as you did yesterday.
You can add the payments made after the consultations. Will it be possible to pay them into the account today?” “Yes,” Mary said. “The bank closes at four. If we leave here at three, we would be there just in time.”
The two friends started counting, as Osofo Antobam gave his clients his directions for solving their problems. On quite a few occasions he closed his eyes as if he was receiving direction from above on what to do.
But as the fetish priest at the Nana Kofi Broni shrine and the dwarfs had assured him, the solutions would certainly be provided. Having heard the huge testimonies earlier in the day, the clients parted with substantial sums of money in expectation.
By Ekow de Heer
Features
The issue of spiritual father in our churches
A student was supposed to go to school as the natural cause of events should be when universities or schools in general opens but this was not the case in a certain young man’s life.
He decided to postpone his trip because apparently he could not get to meet his pastor, his spiritual father. The question is, should this spiritual father die, will the young man’s life come to an end?
Does it mean in such an instance, he is going to curtail his education? This is a worrying trend in a lot of churches where the pastors use this notion of spiritual father to manipulate members especially the youth.
Some unscrupulous pastors utilise this spiritual father concept to have affairs with gullible young ladies in their churches.
Now with homosexuality gradually making inroads into some of the churches, young men are becoming vulnerable to pastors who have hidden homosexual inclinations.
This spiritual father concept is a Biblical concept that runs through both the Old Testament as well as the New Testament. We see it in 2 Kings 4:12 where Gehazi is serving Elisha and also in the New Testament we see Paul relating to Timothy in 1 Timothy 1:2 as a Spiritual Father.
In fact, the concept of spiritual father is a good thing if executed according to the word of God since it helps in guiding the younger ones. However, it becomes problematic when it is being executed by unscrupulous wolves in sheepskins as described by Jesus in Mathew 7:15.
I see it as a way that these unscrupulous so-called men of God maintain their hold on the congregants so they do not question their unchristian actions.
One of the things I have observed since I got born again many years ago is that, any pastor who often insists that members recognise that he is their spiritual father is a warning sign that he is doing some wrong things or is about to indulge in some wrong things.
A parent complained about how his daughter was being influenced by a pastor of the church she attends and how worried he was. I am sure there are many parents out there with stories to tell about how their wards are being made to see their pastors almost like their Jesus.
These pastors have managed to make their congregants so loyal to them and to believe in them so much that it is terrifying, as a parent.
The way things are going, an immediate intervention is required otherwise I am not a prophet of doom but I forsee unfortunate instances where parents burst into church auditoriums and star shooting some Pastors out of frustration and anger.
We cannot look on unconcerned as a society and allow unscrupulous fraudsters using the name of God to create problems for families. My recommendation is for a certain amount of regulation in order to bring some sanity in religious practices.
I agree that ordinarily regulating religious practices makes it a bit restrictive in terms of freedom of worship as enshrined in our constitution but given the way things are going, a bit of regulation will not be out of place.
Disgusting stuff are being attributed to some men of God. There are cases of manipulation of young ladies and sometimes married women by so called men of God and it is bringing Christianity and therefore the name of the Lord into disrepute.
Christianity is gradually losing its attractiveness as a result of the negative reportage resulting from disgusting stuff happening in Christian circles. The way some pastors have been manipulating congregants to take money from them leaves much to be desired to the point where they are convincing some of the youth to give out their phones. May God help us.
By Laud Kissi-Mensah
