Obaa Yaa
Can l trust him?
Dear Obaa Yaa,
We have gone through challenges in our friendship which has spanned five years.
Having received complete endorsement from relatives, friends and people who have our matter at heart, everything was pointing to a pleasurable marriage life.
At the beginning of the year, my fiancé came to inform me that he would like to officially inform my parents about his intention to ask for my hand in marriage.
My parents were glad to receive this information and feverish preparations were made for the performance of the forthcoming customary rites.
This information has gladdened my heart and it has intensified our love for each other. We spent more time on the phone and devoted more time to share interesting moments.
Surprisingly, my fiancé has stopped calling me and has failed to visit me at work and at home.
My fear about his character intensified when l realised that my calls to his line could not go through but when l tried a different number, he picked.
When l enquired from him why my calls could not go through, he explained that he had a challenge with his cell phone, but l realised that there was a problem with our relationship.
In summary, my fiancé has married about three months ago without an explanation.
Should l take action against him?
Dorothy, Tema.
Dear Dorothy,
Naturally you ought to be disturbed because of the heightened expectations your fiancé had generated in your family. Your parents, relatives and well-wishers must have been disappointed in the turn of events.
l can envisage the copious tears you might have shed because of the unfortunate incident.
The relatively short period your fiancé has taken to marry, implies that he must have been monitoring you and this lady who is now his wife.
It is essential for you to know the reason for which he has settled on another person instead of you.
This information would help you to amend whatever you might have done wrong which must have informed your fiancé’s decision to marry a different person instead of you.
Obaa Yaa
My boss is tormenting me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I have worked in a private environment in Accra for 10 years now. People talk about how stressful it is to work in a private sector but I did not believe it till I had my fair share of experience working with my new boss.
Recently, our boss was transferred and was replaced by a new boss.
In fact, I am finding it difficult to work with him.
Looking at my age, he talks to me like am a small boy and relates to me like a teacher and his pupil.
Sometimes, I feel like hitting him but it is against the rules of our company.
I currently do not have another employment opportunity. What can I do? I can’t cope with his behaviour anymore.
Joe Boy,
Ashiaman.
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Dear Joe Boy,
I am afraid you’d have to cope with your boss for the meantime. Learn to live with the ‘devil’ until you find a way about it.
Just live up to your responsibility; perform your functions to the best of your knowledge and do not misbehave towards him.
If he sees that you are competent, he would begin to respect you. Remember that respect is earned not demanded.
Obaa Yaa
I am in a state of dilemma
Dear Obaa Yaa,
My name is Owusu and I am 35- years -old while my wife is 30 years. We have been married for five years but been together for seven years. We have two children together and they are doing so well in their academics.
My company had a conference at a hotel in Kumasi and four of us from my department were selected to represent the company.
During lunch, I decided to take a stroll and enjoy the scenery around the hotel since it’s my first time there.
As I strolled around, I was shocked to see my wife step out of a car with a young man. They started walking towards the reception of the hotel. The man placed his arms around her waist and they seemed to be enjoying each other’s company.
I froze and felt bad. I wanted to shout and approach them but when I opened my mouth, no words came out and my feet were too heavy to drag. I just watched them in awe as they checked in at the reception and disappeared from my sight.
I am in my mother’s house now, I do not know how I will face her if I eventually go home. I told her my mom needs help with a few things at the house so I will lend a helping hand and also sleep over. I haven’t told anyone but my mom suspects that something is wrong.
I am down right now, my marriage and home seem to be coming to an end. Please what should I do?
Sakyi, Adenta.
Dear Sakyi,
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I understand how you feel and I plead with you to continue to be patient with your wife.
Please try and go home to have a word with her concerning the incident you saw.
Give her the benefit of doubt to explain what she was exactly doing there at that time with the man.
I am pleading with you to give her a second chance but most importantly, kindly inform her parents about it to talk to her.
You can seek the help of a professional counselor and go for therapies with her.
However, if you are not comfortable staying with her, please part ways with her peacefully. You can co-parent your daughter.