Obaa Yaa
He calls me too much
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a 25-year-old lady planning to marry my 29-year-old boyfriend. He has all the qualities I want and we have been together for the past three years. He does his own business and I am a teacher.
My only worry is that he is obsessed with me to the extent that he calls my phone almost every hour. When I don’t answer he will continue to call, at least 50 times in an hour.
I have asked him not to call repeatedly because I get too busy sometimes that I am unable to answer calls. But this doesn’t seem to go down well with him. He tells me he would follow me everywhere I go even after we get married.
He says he can’t do without me and that I would have to stop teaching and manage his personal business after our marriage. I know he loves me but I feel he is being too clingy. Is his behaviour normal? Should I proceed with the marriage?
Worried Serwaa,
Haatso.
Dear Serwaa,
As you rightly said, your fiancé is obsessed with you and that is why he wants to be in touch with you at all times. Although you have been together for long, perhaps he still wants to be certain about your movements, hence his frequent calls.
There is nothing wrong with your boyfriend being overly protective. You should be proud that he is head over heels in love with you. But don’t take it too seriously when he says he will “follow you everywhere” even after you both tie the knot. That could be a joke.
His persistent calls should not be a reason for you to abstain from the marriage. Continue to love him as you both plan your life together. The calls are normal and it should not bother you at all.
Obaa Yaa
They get on my nerves
Dear Obaa Yaa,
Both my wife and I are middle school leavers, but because her brothers are overseas, she goes abroad regularly. Because of that she has joined a certain class of people who believe that my wife is better educated than I am and therefore, look down on me.
The way she sometimes communicates with me is so annoying and makes me feel sad.
I overheard one of them asking my wife how she could marry an illiterate like me, and surprisingly she laughed at it as if it was a huge joke. When I confronted my wife afterwards, she denied everything.
I don’t want to divorce my wife, but her friends get on my nerves.
Please advise me.
Kwaku Teye, Konogo
Dear Kwaku Teye,
The current state of your wife is making her feel she is better than you. I can imagine how you feel. It is not fair for your wife to encourage her friends to make derogatory remarks about you.
However, do not make an issue out of it, especially as your wife has denied it.
I will advise you to talk to your wife to stay away from her friends if she really needs her marriage.
I will also plead with you to further your education if you have the means and resources.
Obaa Yaa
My friend has taken over my girl friend
Dear Obaa Yaa,
Sometime ago, I met a pretty girl, but I was too shy to approach her, so I asked a friend to talk to her on my behalf.
My friend came back and told me that after talking to the girl, he learned that she was no good so I should forget about her.
My friend, who is a born again, is always in the girl’s company. When I tackled him about it the first time, he told me that he was trying to get her to change.
They are almost inseparable now and my friend has been avoiding me. I want to confront him in the presence of the girl and embarrass him.
Will I be justified in my action?
Opoku Oware, Accra.
Dear Opoku Oware,
I WOULD not resort to any confrontations if I were you; it will only make you more miserable.
Admittedly, your friend did not behave well because in a way, he has betrayed you.
But don’t forget that he was under no obligation to chat up the girl for you, so don’t blame him.
The next time you see a girl that you fancy, just teem up confidence and boldness and walk up to her.
