Obaa Yaa
He wants me to be his cousin
Dear Obaa Yaa,
My husband and I got married shortly after we completed senior high school. My mother then bought a ticket for him to go abroad where he went and stayed with my brother.
He went through some kind of marriage over there in order to get a good job, or so he said, and he asked me to be patient.
A few weeks ago, my husband wrote to say that he was coming home with his wife, and that I should pretend to be a cousin. I also heard they have a child.
I can’t do what he wants me to, even though everyone, including my mother thinks I should.
And I don’t want to be his wife only when he comes home. I want to join him over there because that was the arrangement.
Akweley, Accra
Dear Akweley,
Don’t let anyone force you into doing anything that you don’t want to do. If you can’t pretend, then don’t try.When you meet your husband, it is important to let him know how you feel about the arrangement.
And you will have to come to an agreement as to whether or not you want to continue with your marriage.
Whatever decision you come up to will not be easy for you, but do make sure that it is what is best for you.
• Kwabena kwabena in
Obaa Yaa
Pastors take too much money from members
Dear Obaa Yaa,
A FRIEND invited me to his church a few weeks ago and I was embarrassed at the way the priest demanded money from the congregation.
Will God bless such offerings extracted from church goers?
Etornam,
Volta Region.
Dear Etornam,
It is true that some churches demand money from their congregation. But it is also a fact that some of these churches uses these funds to build proper places of worship.
Utilities like water and electricity bills plus certain allowances or salaries of full –time workers in the church are also settled with this money.
Indeed if these money is put to proper use, it will enhance God’s work, and contributors would be blessed.
But if the money is misused, the people may think they are deceiving the congregation, but they cannot deceive God.
Obaa Yaa
I can’t make a choice
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a 40-year old banker and doing so well financially. I have a side business and I own two houses at Adenta. I have two girls in my life and I value each one for who they are. I want to settle down this year but I’m finding it difficult to make a choice.
One is financially stable, hardworking but disrespectful. The other is jobless, obedient and dull.
I love both of them and I am finding it difficult to choose. Should I marry one and keep one as a friend or I should leave them all.
They are all very beautiful. I am confused.
Kwansima,
Elmina.
Dear
I don’t believe that you are serious about marriage. I strongly believe you don’t love both of them, because you will never have a second thought when you love someone.
Also, I don’t believe that the girls are as daft as you want to portray.
For instance, what makes you think they are yours to pick and choose what roles they should play?
You are old enough to know what you want and what will be best for you. In as much as the ladies are pretty, each of them have different qualities you also want.
If I were you, I would propose and find out which of the girls would have you.
