Obaa Yaa
My mother and sister do not like my sweetheart
Dear Obaa Yaa,
We were mates and good friends in the university and continued to maintain this cordial relationship till date.
Having expressed mutual love and care for each other in all aspects of our lives, we have decided to seal our love in marriage.
Thank God l had procured a good job, one of the preconditions for a successful marriage, and we have disclosed our marriage plans to our parents and all those who matter.
Unfortunately, l have lost my father, but my mother and my sister have opposed my decision to marry the lady of my heart.
They have not disclosed to me the reason for their disagreement, but l strongly believe it could be due to a long-standing misunderstanding on tribal lines.
l have gone a step further to convince my mother to develop a positive mind about people from this particular tribe, but my efforts had not yielding results.
l believe the situation would have been different if my father were alive.
What step should l take to make them agree?
Frank, Accra.
Dear Frank,
The misunderstanding surrounding your marriage is not an isolated case because it had bedeviled many marriages and would continue to persist.
The advantage you have in this case is the fact that your mother and sister have not identified any shortcoming on the part of your fiancée , which would have automatically rendered her unsuitable for marriage.
You must intensify your efforts in trying to convince your mother in particular not to depend on long-standing tribal problems to derail your plans in marriage. l think if your mother is convinced, your sister will also change her mind.
Additionally, you can seek the assistance of your uncles to intervene and talk with your mother if things are still getting out of hand.
Such entrenched positions on tribal lines are fast giving way to modern way of thinking.
l wish you well.
Obaa Yaa
She says the girl is not my child
Dear Obaa Yaa,
My name is Amos, I am not married but have one child who I cater for. Just recently when I sent my child weekly money for her upkeep, her mother asked me not to bother.
She said that the child was not mine and that she was prepared to pay for everything I have spent on them.
Obaa Yaa, life around me now is hell. I can’t come to terms with what she is telling me after taking care of my child for six years.
Obaa Yaa, what can make a woman behave like this? What should do?
Amos,
Kwahu.
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Dear Amos,
I am really sorry for you. However, it is good that this woman is saying something you have not investigated and know for certainty if the child is yours or not. That will keep your mind at rest.
Take a lawyer and send the matter to court. The court will most certainly order a paternity test where you can know your stand as to the parentage of this girl.
If she is yours, you can take legal steps to claim her from the dishonest mother. If it is proved that she is not your child, then you can make your lawyer prepare a bill for the woman to reimburse you for all you have spent on the child.
Obaa Yaa
I am barren, my husband has impregnated girl, 18
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am 40 years old married for 10 years. I have been to so many hospitals in the country, herbalists and even to spiritualists for a help in child bearing, but to no avail.
My problem now is that, I have just been hinted that my husband has impregnated an 18- year old girl.
He does everything for her. Even though he has not neglected me, I am very hurt, and what can I do?
Akua,
Koforidua.
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Dear Akua,
IT is always good for everybody to investigate what he or she hears before whole-heartedly accepting it as a gospel truth.
Most rumours are peddled about people but they turn out to be false.
Anyhow, let your husband know, what you have heard and let him react to it. You may found out that it is a different story altogether.
However, if it turns out to be true, then it means your husband has not lived up to his marriage vows, and depending on what your religious principles and emotions are, you might advise yourself.
Another option is to stick to your husband and continue seeking a child of your own.
Don’t get stressed out though, take it cool and seek diligently for yours. One day, you will have the last laugh.
