Obaa Yaa
Should l consider this man or quit the relationship
Dear ObaaYaa,
My first relationship fell on rocks when l discovered after three years to my surprise that my boyfriend was married with two children and the lady was staying with his parents in the village while he came to Accra in search of greener pastures.
Though l was surprised to hear the news, the surprise look in his face which left him speechless for some minutes was enough for me to believe that the information l received could not be the figment of imagination of someone trying to be mischievous.
Initially, my boyfriend attempted to whisper some words but quickly realised that he had hit the rocks as the words could not flow and there was nothing he could do under the circumstance to redeem his already damaged image.
By intuition he rose from his seat which was opposite mine, went on his knees to plead forgiveness. I did not allow him to waste his precious energy as l assisted him back on his feet and attempted leading him to his seat but he could not move an inch.
I demanded that our meeting that evening should end for us to continue the conversation the following day, God willing. But l could not sleep throughout the night because of the hurt in my heart and in the morning it was not better either.
Linda, Accra.
Dear Linda,
You ought to thank God for what has happened and the fact that you have discovered this embarrassing news early before you could commit yourself further in this relationship.
So long as this lady and her children are staying with the in-laws means she is still married to the husband.
How would you feel imagine you were married to this man before this secret was revealed to you? Your man has erred for not letting out the parcel in his baggage and going forward to propose to you. He should have known that a secret of this nature will definitely come to light.
Having known the facts, there is no need to waste a second of your precious time in this relationship. Despite the fact that this man has shown some remorse you need not sympathise with him. Work hard at getting yours to avoid unnecessary marital problems.
Obaa Yaa
Under pressure from family to marry
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am 38 and single. In spite of the pressure I receive from my mother, I have decided not to marry now until I am financially sound.
It is this same mother of mine who would keep asking me for things even when I am married.
Obaa Yaa, recently my mother actually came to my house with a 10 member delegation from my hometown in the Ashanti Region at dawn.
Their mission was to give me two weeks ultimatum to marry or else they would bring me a wife from the village.
Obaa Yaa, please what should I do?
Akwasi.
Dear Akwasi,
MARRIAGE is not a child’s play. I understand the fact that you want to be financially sound to decide on marriage.
You are not getting younger so try to give ear to what your mother is saying.
No one can force you to marry against your will. Get to your mother with a respectable elder and let her know that she is embarrassing you with her unwarranted demands.
Assure her that in your own good time, you would get married and that you are not prepared to accept any imposition.
Obaa Yaa
He forcibly kissed me
Dear Obaa Yaa,
I am a 20-year-old girl and a virgin. I have made up my mind not to have sex before marriage or involve myself in any immoral acts.
Interestingly, when I turned 25, I met a man who was in his early thirties doing so well with business.
He is very kind, lovely, faithful, caring, humble and God-fearing.
We began dating for some time and because he didn’t ask for sex, I concluded he was the right man for me.
One holiday, we decided to hang out. He proposed marriage to me, when I said yes, he forcibly kissed me.
Looking at things, I am afraid that he will one day forcibly have sex with me.
Should I go on with this relationship?
Annora, Sunyani.
Dear Anora,
YOU are growing and you should be able stand by the decisions you take.
Once this man has forcibly kissed you, what he intends to do next is to have sex with you.
He might be a good man so don’t end the relationship because of the incident that happened.
If you are not ready to marry, do not accept any love proposal from a man.
If you are also interested in him, kindly tell him to do the needful before any other thing.
